Blue Bi Boy
by Rylee.kai
Summary: Follows the canon well-ish exploring different ships with Lance, and ending with a well needed Klance. As a someone who was straight and discovered she was Bi I thought I could make things a little more interesting and really dive into the character of Lance. Starts with snippets leading all the way up to an after season 8 storyline!
1. 1 Where it all Begins - Part 1

***updated Pidge didn't come to the Garrison until after the Kerberos mission

Where It All began - Part 1

(Lance)

Today was the day, the day he would find out if he got accepted into the Galaxy Garrison. He had been fawning over it ever since he could remember. Thoughts of flying into space, thoughts of flying the ships they took into space, thoughts of looking at the stars.

He told his Abuela and Abuelo every day when he was younger about the crazy missions and discoveries he would make. As the baby of the family everyone wanted him to get in, that was why everyone was at his house tonight, well, almost everyone. Lance walked over to the fireplace, there hung a picture of his abuelo, he held his hand around the frame and closed his eyes. He could feel him, watching over him every day.

Abuela came up and held her hand to my shoulder, "He would be so proud of the de que hombre you have become." I kept the tears in, I always tried to put on a brave face around Abuela.

"Lance! Lance! Lance!" it was Veronica, she just got home for the weekend from the Garrison, oh yeah, that was his awesome big sister, who had been at the Garrison for a couple years now. She was no pilot in training, but he still looked up to her, she was the light in his world.

Veronica ran into the living room and scooped him into her arms, "I have the letter, Iverson recognized the last name and let me bring it home to you in person."

She looked so happy, I wonder if she had already read it? The whole family heard her burst into the house and made their way down. My brothers and sisters, niece and nephew, my mom and pop-pop. The energy of our house filled me with joy, even if that letter were to say I didn't get accepted in I would be happy because everyone came just to support me, and I know they would support me no matter what I chose to do with my life.

"Are you ready Lance?" Veronica asked placing an arm around me and handing me the letter, I stared at the black envelope outlined in gold, this was it, could my dreams finally be coming true?

"Lance McClain, congratulations on your acceptance into the Galaxy Garrison class of 2XXX, your attendance will begin in August 1st," I read aloud, and I felt the tears start coming down, Veronica hugged me, Luis ran over and threw us both into the air. Marco and Lisa came in for a group hug. Silvio and Nadia jumped around us. Mom and Pop-pop both got teary eyed too, which only made it harder for me to keep it together. Abuela just smiled from her chair, she kept looking back and forth from me to the frame on the wall. She made eye contact with me and nodded, my dreams were coming true.

"Lance I am so excited now that I can see you every day I can start teasing you so much more again," Veronica said grabbing my cheek, I pushed her away, everyone else laughed.

"You have to let me be a big man at the Garrison Veronica, I am going to be the best pilot they ever saw, you can't be teasing me," I said blushing. I didn't want her to tease me, but I was excited to have some family there, after all family was our everything. Not having Veronica at home these past few years all the time was so hard, I thought about what that would mean when I left. It's okay, Veronica comes home almost every weekend, I could come home with her, and the family would still be happy together.

The next few months flew by as I anxiously awaited to move into the Garrison. Veronica started telling me twice as many stories, I was already falling in love with the Garrison.

"Hay mijo, I will miss you so much, you better call or text me everyday, and come home on the weekends," Mom said squeezing me so tight I thought my bones were going to break.

"Veronica take good care of nuestra hermano, I know you will, but he tends to find trouble a lot," Marco said messing up my hair. I was going to miss this, but I knew I had to reach the stars for Abuelo. I told him I would. I could feel him looking at me from the stars above.

Veronica and I made our way for to the transportation system, I just had a small bag, the McClain's never had much, I just brought some pictures and clothes with me.

When I arrived I found myself completely overwhelmed, this place was huge. I felt so tiny in all the massive hallways, Veronica helped me check in and set up in my dorm. The first year we lived with in gender separated dorms with our entire class. As you found your area of study and teams you were divided up differently. There were quite a few people in my year. So many different faces. I found an empty bunk, Veronica helped me set up my things and said she would meet me for dinner later.

A boy just about my same height but of a bigger build walked up to me and stuck his hand out, he avoided making eye contact with me. He had darker skin than me and black hair.

"Name is Hunk, guess we are bunk mates...if you are okay with that?" He said before I even had a chance to shake his hand. I firmly grabbed his hand with both of mine.

"Perfectly okay with that, my name is Lance," I said, he turned his face towards me finally, he had big brown eyes, soft and gentle, the Garrison was getting better by the minute, I already made a friend and I just barely got here.

The two of us finished setting up our stuff, and made our way around the facility.

"So, what do you want to specialize in?" I asked him, the more time I spent with him the more I could tell he was a big ol' fluffy teddy bear.

"I want to be a mechanic, my dad used to teach me everything he knew about cars and other engines, then one day we witnessed a Garrison launch, I told my dad I wanted to mix and make engines for ships like that," he said, I smiled, being at the Garrison was so much nicer than normal schools. People there didn't have dreams, and they were always so mean. I shuddered as I thought about the people who used to push me around when I was just a small dainty boy. "What about you?"

"I want to be a pilot," I said, it was a fairly basic answer for people here, a lot of people who came to the Garrison wanted to be pilots, but I knew I could do it, no, I had to do it. "Ever since I was little I would dream about dancing through the stars."

"Well maybe when we get older I can be your mechanic, we just need to find a communications cadet now," Hunk said laughing.

It would be a year or so before we would meet our spunky communications cadet, his name was Pidge.

Classes began. Hunk became my genius saving grace, turns out he was super smart. I didn't have that going for me, and then once pilot trainings began I realized I wasn't the top at that either.

I watched as all the aspiring pilots began to one-up me. I needed to be better. I didn't know how to be. Maybe if I befriend one, maybe we can practice and compete with one another in friendly competitions.

I had my eye on this kid named Keith, he had disaster black hair where the curls somehow managed to point every which directions at the end. He had a lone-wolf personality, so maybe he just needed a friend, he didn't talk to anyone else in the class, and I was part of the friendliest group in class.

"Hey it's Keith right? My name is-" I got up and walked to his desk after class ended, but he cut me short.

"I don't care, leave me alone," he said holding up his hand in my face. From that day on I was sure Keith was out to get me. I hadn't even known what I did to make him hate me so much.

That was also the day that I started to change. It didn't help that Veronica was getting busy on the weekends and I didn't want to travel home by myself. Pilot assessments were coming up so I spent the weekends practicing day and night. I wanted to beat Keith, make him regret not talking to me, not wanting to become my friend.

Maybe I was just hurt. I missed my family, and wanted to expand mine. I wanted someone to give me a hug. Some days I would say in Veronica's room, she wouldn't get home until really late though.

I was so lonely.


	2. 2 Where it all Begins - Part 2

***Updated, Pidge didn't come to the Garrison until after the Kerberos mission

Where it all began - Part 2

(Lance)

I was so lonely.

I was a year older now. I was sixteen. I could finally leave the Garrison without permission. I had taken the pilots exam and not done very well. I mean I didn't get kicked out of the flight program entirely. I was a cargo pilot in training, which was still alright. I would still be able to touch the stars one day.

Pidge joined our group of friends, he was a little more private, but he made up for it in feist and spunk. He was also a super genius like Hunk and more and more I began to question my position as the group "leader."

Pidge and Hunk requested to stay with me, I was so happy to see them stay with me. Veronica had to travel to another Garrison base for six months. They were the only family I had. Though Pidge was becoming more distant and Hunk was worried about his motion sickness. What if they left me?

I hit the town that night. Maybe I could find some ways to ease the loneliness, I knew my family would be disappointed in what I had become, I was no longer Lance, I was someone else, though the people at the Garrison thought I was funny. Maybe they were more laughing at me than with me, but it felt nice to have people care about me, even if it wasn't in a good way.

"Hey, you are pretty cute," a cat call from the side of the street. I considered it, only for a moment, no. I shouldn't be going this. I wanted to fall on the ground and scream. People would definitely think I am crazy then.

I headed back to the Garrison after a couple hours of wandering. I didn't do anything bad, I was somewhat proud of myself.

"Now that Shirogane isn't here to defend your obvious behavioral issues you can get out of this program. We don't have time for someone who can take orders," that voice, Commander Iverson, who was he talking to? I tried to squint through the darkness, was that Keith? Whoever it was had a tiny backpack and was walking away very angrily, probably Keith. I passed by him on my way in, there was that hideous mullet, yep it was Keith. I couldn't believe it, he was getting kicked out of the Garrison? He was the best pilot in our class?

"Is that Lance McClain?" Iverson shouted, I immediately jumped to attention.

"Sir yes sir," thankfully I didn't do anything bad, the thought of encountering Iverson while under the influence was a nightmare.

"Congratulations, you are officially fighter class now, report with your crew to the simulator tomorrow morning," he yelled before storming off.

Me? Fighter class? I felt tears well in my eyes. No, Fighter Pilot Lance McClain didn't cry. I couldn't knock the giddy grin from my face as I ran to find Pidge and Hunk and tell them the good news. I found them in the commissary.

"Guys, guys, you will never guess what just happened? We got promoted to fighter class!" I said practically yelling, I quickly played it cool and ran my hand through my hair. I winked at the girls a table over who glanced at me. They laughed it off a few of them blushing. Damn right, ladies man, and best pilot in the school. That was who I wanted to be, that was who I was going to be. No more pathetic, useless Lance.

"Are you serious? This will be so much more exciting now," Pidge said, fist bumping me.

"Oh dear, that's going to be twice as worse on my stomach, but I know you have been wanting this, so congrats," Hunk said pulling me in for a side hug. I was glad I had them. I most certainly didn't deserve them.

When I went to bed that night I should have been so happy, but I could only think about Keith for some reason. While I was happy to be fighter class it didn't seem fair that the best pilot got kicked out just because he tended to be a bit more hot-headed. I wondered what he was going to do now? More interestingly Iverson had mentioned Shirogane. I remembered him, he had passed away a while ago on the mission ot Kerberos. Was Keith close to him? I had always considered Shirogane one of my heros, I remember crying when I heard he died. I wonder what Keith must have gone through? I wondered where he was now and what he was going to do now?

He may have been a prick, he may have broken part of who I was, but that didn't mean he deserved to be in pain. Hopefully he was going to be alright.


	3. 3 Where it all Begins - Part 3

**Where it all began - Part 3 **

**(Keith)**

A month or so had gone by since I got kicked out of the Garrison. Thankfully Shiro wasn't around, I mean not in that way, I grabbed my head and shook it. Ugh. Thankfully Shiro wasn't around anymore for me to disappoint him. I would have never lived up to his expectations for me. I was a broken boy.

Adam watched me that day, he watched me get thrown out of the Garrison. He looked like he wanted to stop them, but I also saw the pain in his eyes. We reminded each other of Shiro, we reminded each other of what we lost.

It was better this way. I didn't want to hurt anyone.

It was boring out here, it was probably why mom left, there wasn't much to do in our tiny desert shack. I visited dad's grave once a day. I carved another gravestone for Shiro and placed it next to him. The only family and people who mattered in my life. I would race around on my speeder, trying to perfect that trick Shiro always teased me with. I remember when I first got it, I was so happy I screamed and the desert canyons echoed it back. I rushed home to tell Shiro, I spent that night staring at the stars, he was out there somewhere.

I fell asleep that night, full of pride and happiness.

Lions, lions running around. They were colorful, it was captivating. Red, blue, green, yellow, and black. The red one ran up to me and sniffed me, I knew I was dreaming, but I still flinched a bit, I reached out to pet he, but it ran off. They all ran off, except the blue one. She curled up in a ball before me and rested her head. I got up to walk towards her, she moved her head and let out a roar.

My entire body shivered and I bolted awake, that feeling, what was it? There was an energy coursing through me.

I spent days trying to understand this energy. It pulled me around the desert, I found drawings and petroglyphs lining tunnels and canyons. What did it mean?

The search was frustrating, they were all dead ends, but at least it was giving me something to do. It gave me a reason to keep going, and I needed that. I really needed that.

I was tracking the stories the walls told and the star patterns, that was weird, it was like the story stopped today. Was it today? I wasn't too good at reading these things. I had no idea what it really meant. Ugh I just wanted answers. I was impatient.

"Patience yields focus," I said to myself, I could almost hear Shiro's voice in my head. I understood, but what was I even looking for? What answers were they to be found?

I walked outside, I placed my hand against Shiro's grave, I knew he wasn't in there, but could he help me out. I felt like he was connected to this somehow.

"Shiro, please," I said, and the sky turned red for a moment. What the hell? I looked up and a massive meteorite was coming down. "What the hell?"

I got on my speeder, I headed that way. I needed to figure out what this was, this had to be connected right?

The Garrison were already on top of the situation. Of course. I needed a plan. I needed a plan now. A distraction. Yes.

I spent the next bit planting some bombs a bit off from the crash site, that should give me some time. There was one tent people kept coming in and out of. Okay, that's the important one.  
The bombs went off and the Garrison's forces scattered. Now or never, I sped in and leaped off, hopefully all this pumping adrenaline would give me an advantage if there were still people in the tent.

Sure enough, three people in Hazmat suits, easy, those things were not easy to move in. Kick, kick, punch. Too easy. I ran to the table, this is what I launched those bombs for? The person looked human, no time to think, this is what the Garrison cared about, this is what I cared about.

I took a few steps closer. No. Impossible. How was this possible?

"Shiro?" I felt my eyes begin to water, all this time I thought he was dead, he is right here. I cut him loose and lofted part of his body onto me, he was a lot bigger and heavier than me. If only I had help.

"Nope. No, you-no, no, no," I looked up at the voice, maybe if I was lucky this would be someone to help, but we all knew luck wasn't usually on my side. I didn't have time to fight anyone right now. I looked up, three people stood in the doorway, they all looked my age or younger, in fact they looked vaguely familiar. Did the one coming closer to me just say something about saving Shiro?

"Who are you?" I asked, he looked familiar, maybe he was in my class or something, he was actually kinda cute, no, what the hell. Shiro. Get Shiro. He grabbed Shiro's other arm and helped me hoist him up. They weren't dressed in Garrison uniforms, and he said he was here to save Shiro so for once in my life I was going to have to trust someone, there was no way I was getting Shiro out of here by myself in time.

"Who am I? Uh, the name's Lance," he said. Okay Lance, let's get going. He kept babbling on about things, but I didn't have time for this. I was barely sustaining a conversation with him. Come on already.

Okay the one hand, from the guy named Lance was nice, it helped me get Shiro to the speeder, but the other two and now even Lance were extra weight. They both seemed knowledgeable though and I didn't have time to fight over leaving them behind. The bigger guy used some binoculars to tell me the Garrison were coming, now or never.

I sped off, the additional people making it way slower to move. Ugh. Go faster, maybe one of them would just fall off, that would be nice.

I could hear them screaming and babbling. I used the bigger one to help steer, they seemed actually kind of funny. They freaked out every time I did some risky looking jump, but trust me all of it was in my range of capabilities.

The cliff, I looked at it and grinned, this was really going to get them, I sped up and everyone started screaming, a lot. The cute one, no, no, the one who helped me carry Shiro, was yelling something about me going to kill them. Funny.

"Shut up and trust me," I shouted back. Also funny, all of us were putting a lot of trust in one another and I had no idea who these people were, and I think I was fairly infamous for not trusting people.

Last minute I pulled up and I brought us to my house, it wasn't really big enough for all of us, but I gave Shiro the bed, and the other three took the living room floor, I was able to take the couch, not that I slept that much.

The bigger guy, who I learned was Hunk was freaking out about food and how he was never going to be able to go back to the Garrison again. Pidge, the tiny one, stayed up for a while on their laptop, I couldn't tell their gender, so I figured easy enough to go with they for now. Lance, claimed to be too energized to sleep, but as soon as he laid down he was snoring, it was kinda cute. Ugh curse my disaster gay thoughts. This was no time to think of someone like that Shiro was home.


	4. 4 Where it all Begins - Part 4

**Where it all Began - Part 4**

**(Keith)**

Mistakes were made. I wish I could say the mistake was about climbing into a strange alien blue lion ship. No it was talking to Shiro for just a bit too long because. He caught onto my underlying feelings for Lance. Maybe his gaydar was too good. It didn't help that after that Lance continued to prove himself as more and more of an idiot.

It didn't help that literally everything was going in Lance's favor. The blue lion thing had somehow responded and opened up to him. I had been in that cave millions of times and it never lit up. Then somehow the lion was speaking to him? What did that even mean? I was the one who discovered the energy in the first place why wasn't I the chosen one? Plus Lance was a horrible pilot and he was leading us into deep space, what the hell, I mean I think this is considered kidnapping.

Then we land in this mystical castle and he starts flirting with the first thing he finds, what an immature idiot. I should have known he was straight, he had the worst pick-up lines. It was great when the princess trashed his ears, which I actually thought were cute, they stuck out just a bit from his short hair cut.

And who the hell taught this kid math? I flunked out of school a ton, but at least I could do basic math. In what reality did the thousand equal one thousand plus ten. So stupid. What was this, I was blushing? No, impossible, why would someone being incompetent be cute? Oh and to think after I corrected him he had the decency to call me a drop out. Ugh.

This kid was going to be the bane of my existence. It didn't help that every chance he had he would take a jab at me. So annoying.

Wow, I had just traveled across the universe, met two aliens who had been asleep for ten thousands years and learned that there was some psycho space war lord and I was thinking about Lance.

Focus, Allura was speaking, something important. Shiro piloting the black lion, or supposed leader of the group. Seemed reasonable. Pidge as the curious and intellectual lion, made sense. Oh there goes Lance saying something stupid again, haha, too good, the princess didn't even bother finishing what she was going to say about the blue lion, but honestly know I am a little curious.

Hunk had the might yellow lion, he did seem rather strong and caring. Allura turned her gaze over to me.

"The red lion is temperamental and the most difficult to master. It's faster and more agile than the others, but also more unstable. It's pilot needs to be someone who relies more in instincts than skill alone. Keith, you will fly the red lion."

Temperamental, check. Difficult, check. Unstable, check. I felt like there were more insults in there than compliments, but being the red lion made me Shiro's right hand man, which seemed fitting, he was like a brother to me. What I wouldn't do for him? Instincts huh? Isn't that what Shiro told me when he told me to come to the Garrison, something about being a natural, acting on a whim.

Well, unfortunately I was going to have to wait to find my lion, once again the jealousy set in. Everyone else had their damn lions and here I was the one who did all the hard work to find the blue lion to be lion-less.

I wandered around the castle, Coran and Allura were so busy trying to figure out what happened in the past ten thousand years, and I just wanted to be myself. Always. Wanting. To. Be. Alone.

Everyone returned and I made my way up, I guess Lance and Hunk had a hard time escaping, Lance went into this super storytelling mode, throwing his arms in every direction and making crazy sound effects.

"I thought I was a goner, when last minute Hunk, POOSH, came out of the ground and BAM BAM took out the missiles heading right for me, then he KRAWK crushed the ships under him. I could have died, but ol' blue and yellow saved the day," Lance said leaning against Hunk, ha, such a child, it was almost adorable.

The alarm sounded, the galra ship was approaching, didn't Coran say we had days or something? It had been a few hours at most.

There was so much arguing. What were they talking about, running away? Why would we run away from this fight? Didn't we have the most powerful weapons in the universe or something? I may be great at running away from my feelings, but running away from things like this, not for me. We had a chance.

"Staying is our only option," I blurted out.

"Here's an option: Shut your quiznak!" Lance yelled back, ugh what the hell was his problem. We were called here, we were here for a purpose bigger than ourselves.

"I don't think you are using that work correctly," I yelled back.

"What do you know mullet?" he yelled back, ugh why did he keep mentioning my mullet? I kinda liked it. Keith shut your mind up and focus, fighting with Lance was more important than thinking about your haircut.

"We are staying," I said taking a step forward, maybe I could get him to back down, I was probably a bit buffer than him.

"Leaving," he said, he put his head right up next to mine, I probably had more muscle, but he balanced me out in his physique and stature. He also didn't seem like he was about to back down. Thankfully Shiro butted in. I crossed my arms aggressively, back to brooding then. Lance had shove his hands in his coat pockets, stretching out his coat. I rolled my eyes.

Eventually Lance stopped getting on my nerves every damn second, and we decided to stay and fight. Time to get my lion. Finally. Pidge flew us up to the ship, Here goes nothing, second alien ship of the day.

"That crazy energy," huh, I said, I was running through the halls of the Galra ship alone, confused, and a little frustrated, okay super frustrated. Pidge dragged Shiro away from me. I was left alone to find my lion and I couldn't get Lance's stupid voice out of my head describing the "crazy energy" that I had originally described.

I closed my eyes, come on, come on, we were running out of time. There it was. I could feel it, the crazy energy. I ran towards it. It was smaller than blue, it's fine. Don't get all butt hurt, Allura said it was faster and more agile, it had to compensate right?  
Come on red lion, I am right here, open up. Come on. Come on. Ugh, why wasn't it working, the enemies were going to be on top of me any moment now.  
Spoke too soon. There they were, why the hell wasn't this stupid lion responding to me? I opened the hatch, great idea, just rip everyone out into space, including yourself. Heh, at least you aren't as much of an idiot as Lance. Nope, just as big of an idiot. I was dangling to the ship, nope, I was falling into space now. Great.

Then I was eaten by a giant red lion. My day was getting weirder and weirder. I made my way to the control panel, Lance was right, it was speaking to me, in a weird, unexplainable way. Ooh, yeah this was going to be fun. I dove and flew around in circles, this was way more fun than any ship or simulator I had ever been in before.

Somehow we managed to ward of the attack from Sendak, the whole thing was incredible. I didn't have words. We came together, formed the ultimate weapon in the universe and took out an entire ship. Who even knew how. It was amazing. I could get used to this. Being a part of something greater than myself. Yeah, I need something greater than myself. I need it.


	5. 5 Where it all Begins - Part 5

**Where it all began - Part 5**

**(Lance)**

It all happened so fast. I don't think I really realized what was happening yet. There was this comfort in being needed, in not being useless, and I let it go to my head. Here I was lavishing in blue robes and lion slippers. I was never really great with responsibility. I mean I was only seventeen, what did you expect?

Ugh Coran, Allura, and Shiro were pushing us so hard. I almost died again, okay, maybe I was being a little dramatic with that statement, but still Allura was basically bombing us from the safety of her castle. Craziest damn princess I ever met, but she was really pretty, though I had never laid my eyes on an alien before, or a princess for that matter. It was fun to playfully flirt with her, I didn't know if it was cause I actually liked her or what.

Coran was spouting a bunch of stuff and I was too busy trying to enjoy my life. I didn't want to think about the real world. It was why I messed around all the time. If I made all of life a joke I wouldn't have to think about the joke that I was.

Poor Keith, I kept giving him the short end of the stick, it was fun though, to mess with him, he got flustered so easily, it was actually adorable. Well it was adorable to piss him off right until we both crashed into the ground going full speed, my body didn't appreciate that one bit.

Of course, it was also payback for whatever happened in the maze, I knew it was mostly my fault, but I didn't enjoy being in the dark. Being out of control, I tried to play it off, and having Keith lead me only made it easier, everyone probably assumed we hated each other.

These drills were kicking my ass. What happened to this being fun. Ah shit, I got thrown across the floor, ugh. Oh shit, I braced, Keith landed directly on top of me. That was going to bruise. He pushed himself up to protect Shiro, damn he was pretty ripped, impressive. He had always been impressive though, and I was never going to compare to him. I looked down, god, maybe I wasn't met to be a space explorer after all.

Coran interrupted my thoughts, thankfully. Food? I was down, I was starving I needed a break. I took my seat and was surprised to see Keith took the seat right next to me. I figured at this point he would hate me. I was by no means being particularly nice, I mean I was just making fun of him in my own way, it made him laugh and get a rise out the normally brooding quiet kid. It was nice.

And then it was not nice, what were these? Cuffs? I just wanted to eat damnit. Keith and Hunk both kept pulling me in either direction, this was not ideal. Thankfully I was ambidextrous. I reached with my hand connected to Hunk to scoop some food, it went flying, Keith had lurched forward trying to get food from Pidge. Ugh. I couldn't blame him, I knew it wasn't his fault.

"We're not some prisoners for you to toy with, like...like…" Keith stood up blazing anger, you know he definitely made anger look hot. Did I just say that? Ehh, it was true who cares.

"Like a bunch of toy prisoners," I said, backing him up. He was right, this pretty princess lady was starting to go a little crazy. I was sick of her yelling at us every hour to get back to work, we were trying.

"Yes, thank you, Lance," it came out slow and unexpected, I almost laughed. I didn't really hate Keith. I hated myself for never being as good as him, and pretending to hate him or mess around with him, was so much easier and more fun. Remember, the more you mess around and pretend like the world is dandy, the more others won't see how empty you are.

Suddenly food was being thrown everywhere, what in the hell. I tried to duck and dodge it but I forgot we were all connected to one another. We looked at one another and sprung into action, no way we were going to lose this. The food fight went on for a bit, it was fun, this was what I signed up for. This is what I was here for.

"You are finally working as a team," I thought she was going to start yelling at us again, but no she actually, was back to her cute, kind, and supportive self. Thank the lions.

"Hey she's right," Keith said looking directly at me. Look I could work as a team player, it was just easier not too, but I felt pretty good in the moment, that was the most fun I had had in probably months.

"I actually don't hate you right now," gotta keep up the act right? I can't have people seeing through me. I didn't hate him or anyone else here, just myself.

We basically rushed out of there and formed Voltron, turns out a food fight was all you needed to bond with your team. We came back and I felt great, the adrenaline and dopamine pumping me up.

"Man that was so cool, I'm so charged up I don't know if I am going to be able to sleep tonight," I said, I was ready, let's keep going? Maybe a game or two more. I didn't want to let go of this feeling.

"Not me, when my head hits the pillow I'm going to be lights out," Keith said, he and everyone else looked ready to sleep for days. Well I guess no one was going to stay up and have fun with me. So much for keeping that happiness level up. I made my way to my room, and put my head to the pillow. Looks like Keith was right, lights out.

**(Keith)**

Staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. I just want to stop thinking long enough to fall asleep.


	6. Interlude 1: Shiro's Family Part 1

**Sometimes I will post these interludes between main parts of the story. I have no idea when I will throw them in or what they will be about, but here is the first one!**

**Shiro's Family - Part 1**

**Shiro**

"What do you mean?" I asked the police officers, they had informed me that they had brought my car in along with the student Keith.

"He has several misdemeanors, though we usually let him off the hook, his father passed two years ago, we knew him well here, he was a firefighter," well, that would explain the behavioral issues.

"Good, let's keep this off the record and I will take him home," I said, they brought Keith out, and I walked him outside.

I liked him, he reminded me of myself, when my family moved to the United States I tried to fight my problems away. Fortunately Garrison liked that fighting quality and brought me in.

I gave the kid a note, I wanted to see how much like me he really was. If he wanted to change his life, turn it around, I would give him a chance. If he came tomorrow I would know.

I went back to the Garrison and found Adam in the lounge, I took the seat next to him, but he refused to look at me.

"You are late," he said, oh shit, he was mad.

"I know my car got stolen while I was recruiting," I said trying to poke him.

"Your car got stolen? By what a twelve year old? I-" he started.

"Close he was actually fourteen," Adam stopped and finally looked at me.

"Your car actually got stolen? Jeez you are a disaster," he said he got up to make some tea, and offered to make me some, I declined.

"I think I am going to talk to the Garrison about bringing him in, he's lost, he needs something," I said.

"So caring about some random stranger," oh stars I made him mad again. This was about the whole dating thing, he had me to his boyfriend right before I left on my last space mission, my first one I did without him, and I told him we should when I get back. Let's just say I never talked to him about it.

"Adam, can we not talk about this right now?" I loved Adam, I loved him so much, but I was in a race against time, who knew how long I had to still pilot a plane? Not that he knew yet. I couldn't tell him, not yet.

"Why not, why keep putting it off? You mean something to me, I know I mean something to you, unless I don't because if I don't I am going try and move on," he yelled, thankfully it was late, almost every one else had gone to their dorms. "Shiro I am getting a promotion, they want me to be a professor, I can have my own apartment at the Garrison, and I want to share it with you, I want to have a life with you."

A promotion? To be a professor? All of this was great news, and instead Adam was throwing it at me.

"Congratulations on your promotion, that makes you the youngest professor in the history of professors," I said getting up to go hug him. He looked like he was going to throw the tea at me, but he set it down and hugged me back.

"When are you going to talk to me Shiro?" he whispered into my ear. He knew something was wrong, he knew I wasn't telling him something, but how was I going to tell him. I didn't want to hurt him, they weren't even sure if I was going to live beyond thirty-five, how could I do that to Adam, he deserved someone he could love forever, someone he could love and grow old with.

"Will you be my boyfriend?" I asked him, he pulled back and checked my eyes, he poured into my soul, he knew I was being genuine, and pulled me in for a kiss.

"Yes."

I was still floating when I went to go wait for Keith. I was officially dating the man of my dreams.

"Why are you smiling like that?" I looked down from the sky and Keith was there, was he brooding right now? Stars this kid needed to let happiness into his life, have a little fun.

"Just thinking about all the good things in life," I said, and as soon as I said it his face fell more. Shit, what did I say? Oh right his dad had passed away only two years ago.

"Come here," I took him around and showed him the old ships we kept in storage, he knew a lot of random facts about the missions, looks like I could be right. I watched his frown disappear and turn into curiosity and happiness, I smiled, having a kid would be nice, unfortunately I was probably never going to have one.

"Keith can I take you home," his face dropped again, he looked like he didn't want to leave. The officers said that Keith stayed with his mom somewhere pretty far from the city. I couldn't just take him to the Garrison I had to have his approval first.

"Uh, uh yeah sure," He climbed into my car and we rode off, to my surprise he guided me back into the city. He told me to stop, and got out, I followed after him.

"What are you doing?" he snapped at me, I nearly jumped back, so feisty.

"I wanted to introduce myself to your family and tell them I think you have a lot of potential for the Garrison," I said back, he was giving me dagger eyes.

"I thought you were just dropping me off," he said before mumbling something under his breath. He looked around and then walked back into the car. What the hell.

I climbed in after him, and he started giving more directions, what was this kid up to? We ended up in the middle of the desert, okay that made more sense from what the police were telling me, we came up on a small shed.

"I live here," he climbed out and started kicking around in the dirt. I got out to and walked over to him. "But uh, I-I don't have any family left."

His eyes welled up and I pulled him into a hug instinctually. My heart yearned. It actually reminded me of Adam, his mother passed away when he was younger and his father disowned him when he came out. The Garrison was where he found purpose and will again. This boy had been living on his own in the desert, being teased and made fun of by the students.

"Do you think the Garrison will take me in? I heard they have dorms and food," he said and I pulled him in tighter. I was going to make the Garrison take him in.

"I know they will," Keith pulled away and looked at me with his grey blue eyes, they screamed with hope, I was going to take care of him from now on.


	7. Interlude 1: Shiro's Family Part 2

**Shiro's Family - Part 2**

**Adam**

"Intruder, attack on sight," I listened and nodded, I moved behind the door way, I looked to peak around the corner when a shot went flying centimeters from my face, I turned back.

I looked back over at Keith who had briefed me on the situation and given me my weapon. He was standing on the other side of the doorway. He motioned at me that he had eyes on the intruder. I motioned back that I would cause a distraction.

Now or never, I leaped through the doorway I took a shot to the shoulder and yelled out, but Keith dove and took his shot, landing it right on our attacker's chest.

"Adam," Keith then dove for me, "That monster, look what he did to you!"

"Really me a monster?" Shiro said getting up and laughing, he had goo splattered all over his chest.

"Adam, your sacrifice to save the entire world will never be forgotten," Keith said pretending to cry before Shiro picked him and whirled him around. Shiro placed him over one shoulder and then threw me over his other shoulder. He planted us onto the couch.

This was nice. This was really nice. It had been two years since I started dating Shiro and Keith came into our lives. Shiro knew I would have a soft spot for Keith, and I certainly did, which was why I let Keith sleep on our couch, unfortunately since Keith wasn't our actually adopted son we didn't qualify for a bigger apartment, and Keith technically had bed at the Garrison in his bunk room.

"I'll clean the kitchen and make dinner, we will be having a talk Keith," his and Shiro's faces both fell. Did they really think I wouldn't hear about Keith's fight?

I know Keith had it hard, he never met his mother and lived with his dad in the desert for twelve years. Then he watched his dad go back into the building, save an old woman, and then collapse and die. He spent the next two years trying to get by, stealing food or taking up odd jobs to get food. He was lucky Shiro found him when he did.

I lectured both of them for a while, they both nodded solemnly, I was the rational one of the group, and probably the most honest with myself emotionally. Both Shiro and Keith had issues being honest with how they felt. I wish they would just open up.

"But now, I have a gifts for us," I said grabbing the boxes from the kitchen. I handed one to each of them and kept one for myself.

"What for?" Keith asked as he opened the box, he pulled out the silver chain and he had one tag, Shiro had two that clattered together lightly.

"Shiro and Adam XX/XX/XXXX and Our Family SAK XX/XX/XXXX," Shiro read from each of his tags, I opened mine which just had tag, I removed my chain from around my neck and added the new tags, before my mom passed she gave me the necklace, it was from her dad from the years of the third World War. It was the only thing I still had of her.

"It's been two years since Keith came to the Garrison and became a part of our family, so I thought we should commemorate it especially since Shiro was offered a position on Samuel Holt's latest mission," I said, I also wasn't a person for keeping secrets, Keith lost it.

"You are leaving?"

"Not, yet and we don't even know if the mission is a go, which is why I didn't tell you," Shiro said covering his ass and eyeing me.

"I prefer relationships built on honesty," I said back.

"Shiro, Adam is right, had you told me I probably would have understood better, I am happy for you, you talk about how much you miss flying in space a lot," Keith said fixing himself back in his chair and placing his tags around his neck, he followed in my pursuit and tucked them under his shirt.

"I am sorry, I should have told you sooner," Shiro said, his face fell, something was bothering him, I wondered what, a conversation for later.

Keith stayed around a bit longer and went to his bunk, they had an early training tomorrow and didn't want to be late.

"Thank you for this," Shiro said grabbing his necklace and tucking it into his shirt, which he managed to get water all over while washing the dishes, what a mess, what would he do without me.

"I'll meet you in bed then," I said walking to our room seductively. I wonder if I should bring up my question now? I mean we had been dating for two years, and I couldn't picture myself with anyone else.

"Adam, there is something I need to tell you," Shiro said walking into the room and starting to change.

"You know me too," I said, I wondered if we had the same thing? Had he been thinking too? He climbed into bed and wrapped his arms around my waist tucking me into him. I felt something wet drop onto my head, was that a tear?

"Adam, I am so sorry," he said, and I flipped around. What the hell, that was not what I was expecting. He looked like he was in so much pain, what was wrong?

"What is it?" I asked, I cradled his cheek in my hand, seeing him like this, seeing him open himself up, it was healthy, I pulled his head into my chest.

"I am sick Adam," he said. "I am really sick. I have a muscular disorder, I am probably going to die before I am forty."

I was completely stunned. Shiro, die? He was my hero he was my everything, he was who I wanted to marry and spend my life with, "Okay, it's okay. Let's get married."

I didn't even realize what I said until it came out. Shiro stopped and pulled away, just far enough to look into my eyes.

"Didn't you hear what I just said?" he said, he was wiping his tears away.

"I heard exactly what you said, I want to spend all the time you have left as your partner," I said, brushing his puff of hair back.

"Let's get married," he said, he laughed a smile out and kissed me. He kissed me a lot, and I was happy, well, I was happy that we could be happy together.

"You didn't tell him?" I asked, rubbing my hands over his new bracelet, it helped administer medicine to his muscles. I sent him and Keith out today with the intention of Shiro finally telling Keith about his illness.

"He's been through so much already, I don't want to take away anymore of his fragile happiness," Shiro said refusing to look me in the eyes. I understood, Keith was fragile, but he had the right to know.

"Adam, they don't want me to go to Kerberos, they think it's too dangerous with my condition," he said he moved himself to sit between my legs. I didn't want him to go to Kerberos either. I wanted him here. I wanted to get married and move into an actual house, give ourselves an actual life. Keith can come live with us too.

"Imagine if you don't, we could move to Japan like you always talked about, we could buy a beautiful home near the beach. Keith could come live with us, or at least visit us. Your family could stay there," I started.

"What kind of life is that? Watching me die for ten years? Bringing my family to watch their only child die? Bringing Keith a person we consider a son to watch me die for ten years? Having you marry me and then watch me die for ten years? That isn't a life," Shiro snapped, I was taken back. What was this, he never expressed feelings like this before, it wouldn't be watching him die, it would be spending time with him while we had him.

He left the bedroom, and I stayed back stunned. I didn't understand him, why was he doing this? Trying to trap himself into a reality of unhappiness? Shiro slept on the couch that night, and I slept alone in the bed, thinking what all of this meant.


	8. Interlude 1: Shiro's Family Part 3

**Shiro's Family - Part 3**

**Shiro**

I dreamt that night, of a beautiful home in Japan, Adam and I looking over the ocean, Keith was playing at the beach with my father. Mom was cooking in the kitchen, I could smell the home cooked meals I missed so much.

Then I was in a bed, I was in bed all the time, tears and melancholy filled the house, and it never left. Soon I was in a hospital bed in the house, Keith and Adam would hold my hands all through the night. Mom wouldn't even come in anymore, she made dad bring the tea and porridge in.

Then I was taking my last breath.

I startled awake, my back, that's right I slept on the couch that night, Adam and I had been in fights before, but since we started dating it wasn't usually anything serious. I couldn't believe I told him I would marry him. If I could have forever with him I would. I wanted him to have that. He deserved better.

I wanted to give my last breaths to changing the world, not to watching everyone I care about cry about me.

Over the next few days Adam couldn't look me in the eyes, I started sleeping in our bed again, but we didn't talk and he slept on his side and I slept on mine. Keith came over for dinner, he was so happy he just got into the fighter pilot ranks, he didn't even notice the tension in the air. I knew I should apologize and I knew I should tell Keith about my illness.

I got a notification, it was Sam, I dismissed myself from the table, Adam began clearing the dishes and Keith gave me a hug before running off to who knows where.

"Shiro, you are here," Dr. Sam Holt, all my latest missions had been with him, he had such high hopes for me and I shared with him many things, he was my mentor, he was my idol.

"Of course, is this about Kerberos?" I asked, Sam had been pushing hard to get me as the pilot, there was a lot of disagreement though, many in the higher command considered it too dangerous.

"Shiro I need to know, I need to know how important it is for you to go back into space, is it worth cutting your days shorter?" Sam said.

"Before I die I have to go back out there Sam, I have to. I have known too long that I was in the fight for my life, that was why I pushed so hard, that was why I broke all the records, to prove that my own fate couldn't stop me from being incredible. Space is the place that let me do that, being out there I don't feel like I am dying," I said, it was true. It was during my cadet years that I discovered I was sick, and since I pushed and never stopped.

"That is all I needed to know, let's get you out there."

The next day Admiral Sanda and Holt showed up to my office, they were arguing with one another, Sanda yelled at me to stand down, not to do it, she wouldn't let me. Sam threatened pulling the whole mission. It was a disaster.

I needed a break, I came to the professor lounge, a few people there, there was Adam, we still hadn't talked.

"Everything okay?" his voice startled me, besides the fake conversations we had with Keith at dinner he had hardly muttered a word. I must have looked more upset than usual.

"Iverson thinks I shouldn't go on the mission. Called in the big guns, Admiral Sanda showed up and tried to convince Sam to remove me from the crew," I said playing with the bracelet on my wrist.

"Well, maybe he's right. Maybe you shouldn't go on the mission. You'll only be putting yourself at risk," he said, so calm, as if we weren't fighting. Before he didn't tell me not to go on the mission, he knew how much space and these missions were to me. Why wasn't he listening to me?

I wanted to throw my bag around the room and punch a wall.

"Takashi, how important am I to you?" he hardly ever used my first name, what was this? He was so important to me. My head began to spin, he wasn't going to make me choose was he? Between him and living my life, between him and my dreams. "This is more than a mission. This is your life at stake."

I wasn't going to die out there, I would be back, I would be back and we could get married, well, I would rather if we didn't I don't want Adam to struggle to move on once I have left.

I snapped again, "Don't start that again, Adam. You don't need to protect me. This is something I need to do for myself."

"I know I can't stop you, but I won't go through this again. So if you decide to go, don't expect me to be here when you get back," he left, just like that. He was the one who asked me to marry him and now he was backing out? I would come back? I would love him, I would be happy with him.

"When were you going to tell me?" I had gone outside, hopefully the fresh air would help clear my head, make me think straight, why did I snap at Adam? What was I doing? What was the right choice?

I turned to find Keith, brooding again? I thought we moved past that, "So what is it? Are you sick or something?"

No, no, no how did he find out? "I was outside your office. I overheard you and Commander Holt talking with Admiral Sanda. Tell me the truth. Tell me what's wrong. I'm not a little kid. I can handle it."

But I couldn't handle telling you...I couldn't handle telling anyone. I couldn't handle the reality of the life I led. I just wanted to fly away from my problems.

"I'm going on that mission," I told Keith. He gave me a hug and supported me, he said he was angry that I kept the truth with him for so long, and that I should talk to Adam, he would understand if you open up to him.

I knew he was right, but I couldn't face Adam, not right now. I would break down if I saw him. He was so hurt at me leaving, and I was hurt.

Days before the mission was go for lift off I found a note in my office. I hadn't stayed at Adams in weeks, I was just sleeping in my office, I was so weak, why couldn't I talk to him.

_Takashi, _

_I know you aren't going to change your mind, I know why you are doing this, you are living, you are trying to live so hard that you won't have regrets. It just hurt me, it hurt me to know that I wasn't part of this short life you made for yourself. I was ready to be at your side, through the pain and happiness, and yet you wouldn't let me. _

_If you weren't going to let me into your life why did you tell me yes? That is what hurt the most. You let me think I could spend your future with you, even though that clearly wasn't the future you wanted. Why can't you be honest with me and those around you? _

_I love you so much, I will probably always love you, I just wish you would let me love you. Stay safe and keep living my space ranger._

_Your Love and Best Friend, _

_Adam_

Tears, tears everywhere. Keith was right, I should have just spoken to him. I ran to his room, I didn't know what I would say or if I would change it, but I wanted to give him one last hug.

I knocked on the door, and Keith opened it.

"Shiro? Shiro! Shiro…" what was that? Keith's face just fell. "Shiro, he left earlier for another one of the bases, he isn't coming back for a month."

A month? He left without saying anything. I clenched the letter in my hand. I fell on the ground and Keith hugged me.

"I am sorry Shiro," Keith said, I noticed his dog tag, he must have been looking at it. I pulled my own out. Adam had ours updated, _Shiro and Adam XX/XX/XXXX, XX/XX/XXXX_. He added the date he proposed. What was I doing? I had a good life right here, and I was throwing it away because I was obsessed with living.  
"When I get back, I am going to fix everything," I said, Keith nodded, he was holding back his own tears.

I broke our family because of my own selfishness.


	9. Interlude 1: Shiro's Family Part 4

**Shiro's Family - Part 4**

**Adam**

"Adam, Adam," I got up from the counter to open the door.

"Yes?"

"It's Shiro, the Kerberos it…" My eyes widened, Keith tousled on the couch, I hurried into the hall to not disturb him.

"What about it?" I asked, the officer ran off, I followed him, what was it? They had a successful landing as far as I understood earlier that day. Keith and I watched the feeds together. I was starting to move on, trying to date others, it wasn't easy. I always thought I would spend my whole life with Shiro. Keith told me that Shiro planned on fixing everything when he got back. Keith didn't know Shiro like I did, Shiro was too ambitious, if he was planning on dying at forty he was going to make every breath on in this world worth it.

"I have bad news," Iverson said, I was sat down in a conference room, there were four others in the room, but my focus was on Iverson. "We lost all contact with the team on Kerberos, we spent the last few hours searching for answers, but have come up completely empty handed. We are concluding the mission as a failure and claiming the crew as deceased."

Someone cried across from me. I would recognize those glasses and that hair anywhere, it was the daughter of Commander Holt. I closed my own eyes. Shiro, gone? I told you Keith, he wouldn't be back to fix everything. He would keep dreaming until his dreams got too big.

Colleen, Sam's wife was trying to comfort her. We knew each other well, after the first mission Shiro and Sam went on we talked a lot, and called out our partners for the idiocy and also how much we loved them. I wanted to reach out to her right now. Her husband and her son, both, dead.

I wasn't even with Shiro anymore, why was I here? Iverson must not have realized that we broke our engagement, or maybe he did, and thought I should hear it from him and not from the TV or rumors.

"Commander Iverson right, was he happy?" I turned my attention to the other two at the table. Shiro's parents? I had never met them, Shiro said they liked to travel and if they ever touched down near here he would introduce me to them, but they never made it out here.

Iverson looked at me, his head solemn and then back to the Shirogane's, "He was very happy."

She turned into her husband and I watched her cry silently for a while. Is this what Shiro wanted? Did he want to risk everything so that he could die a hero in space and not spending his life weak but around those who loved him?

I stood suddenly filled with rage, he was only twenty four, he still had so many years to give us, so many years of happiness. I grabbed my dog tags and ripped them off and stormed out of the room.

"Keith, Keith," I shook him to wake, I had to tell him, I already told Iverson Keith and I wouldn't be reporting tomorrow.

"Adam?" he grumbled rolling over.

"Keith come on, I have to tell you something," I was trying to stay cool. Being irrational was never a good look on me.

"What time is it?" he asked.

"Doesn't matter, you aren't going to class tomorrow, come on, let's go to your house," I said, Keith's eyes shot open when I said that.

"Why would we go to my house?" he asked, and then saw my eyes, Keith threw himself into me. I let the rage go, I may have broken up with Shiro before he left, but the three of us were still a family, a broken little family, but a family.

Keith put on his jacket, I still remember going with Shiro into town on Keith's birthday to find him that. I wasn't sure about the crop, but Shiro said it was perfect. Sure enough Keith loved it. My heart, it ached.

Keith and I stepped into the hallway, we had been silent since he asked why we were going to his house.

"Adam?" that voice, it was Mrs. Shirogane, I wanted to keep walking, I didn't want to turn back, but I had no choice. I had to remind myself that I wasn't Shiro, I didn't run from my problems.

Keith and and I turned around to face, Keith's breath caught, it was easy to tell who they were.

"Mr and Mrs. Shirogane, it's unfortunate that we had to meet under these circumstances, but it is an honor to finally meet you," I said shaking both their hands, they both had red eyes.

"You threw this," Mr. Shirogane said holding up my tags, irrational indeed. Two of those tags belonged to my family.

"Iverson said you were my son's family for the past several years," Mrs. Shirogane said bending down to take Keith's hands. "Ever since he found out about his illness he cut us out, he didn't want us to watch him suffer."

Of course he didn't.

"We just wanted to have a chance to meet you, to meet the people his light was able to shine on," Mr. Shirogane said, Shiro's light could still be shining on us, he could still be here.

They gave us hugs before parting ways and Keith and I made it out to his house. Keith found a flat rock slab and carved Shiro's name, birthday, and today into and set it down next to his father's grave.

I was hurting, I was hurting so much that I made the most ridiculous decisions. I let the bitterness and pain get to me.

"Keith the base in Europe asked me to come teach for a few months, that was where my mother died, I would like to go out there," I said, Keith was still the epimaty of sadness. I loved Keith, but I needed some time to myself. I would always see him as a son, as family, but right now he reminded me of Shiro, Shiro and his selfishness.

"Take it, you need it," Keith said shortly.

"If I am not here and you get into trouble there is nothing I can do for you, the Garrison doesn't put up with discipline cases," I said, I could already feel myself distancing myself from Keith. I grasped the tags around my neck. The family I had searched for for so long was falling apart.

"I understand," Keith said, he hugged me and we stayed like that until morning.

I was leaving for Europe in two days, when I got a call about Keith, no Keith not right now. I was starting to get my life together.

"So Takashi Shirogane dies and you last out you juvenile brat?" that was Admiral Sanda, what did Keith do to get her attention, jeez Keith you couldn't just lay low and get through the ranks, you were made to be a pilot.

" Keith Kogane you are not made for the Garrison and the fact that we let Shiro keep you here this long is ridiculous, without Shiro you cannot be controlled and Adam is leaving for the European base, it doesn't make sense," she shouted.

Maybe she was right. Maybe I should take a page out of Shiro's book and be a little selfish. Keith walked out of the office next to Iverson, he made eye contact with me. His face stayed stone cold, he realized I wasn't going to step in.

We reminded one another the thing that brought us together. I held my tags, I am sorry, sorry to my little broken family, but I needed to find a new life for myself.


	10. A Spark - Part 1

**A Spark - Part 1**

**(Lance)**

We faced a giant monster alien that was absolutely terrifying. Okay maybe this wasn't what I signed up for. The blue lion dragged me out here somewhat against my will. When was I going to be able to return home? I wanted to be back home safe on Earth. Perhaps being told I was useless was a little better than being terrified of robots and aliens trying to constantly kill me.

Allura said there was some sort of party happening today, maybe that would help me take my mind off all of this. I forced myself out of the lounge room, I enjoyed it in there, I could comfortably sit in my favorite position, legs hanging over the back of the couch.

I found everyone hanging out with the Arusians in the main of the castle. Even Keith looked like he was enjoying himself. Oh, no Pidge and Shiro had the brooding faces now. Turns out if Keith wasn't brooding two people had to be brooding to make up for it. I laughed to myself and made eye contact with him, he waved and then looked away, so weird. I wonder what his deal was. He was standing next to Hunk and I talked to them for a bit. Coran ran around and handed us drinks.

"Do you think these are like alcoholic beverages?" Hunk said examining it closely and smelling it.

"Let's hope so," I said taking a chug, ugh, nope super fucking nasty. I spit it everywhere. It tastes like dirty water, but hey it kicked in pretty fast. I was already feeling more relaxed. We all took turns trying it, it got much easier after the first sip. Hunk and I spoke for a bit. He reminded me of the thing I didn't want to think about, getting home to Earth and what it meant to be a part of Voltron. Fighting dangerous people and maybe never seeing home again.

I missed home so much, "There's only one planet with Veradera beach, pizza shack looking over the water, and the garlic knots and my mom's hugs." Shit were those tears, "I'm sorry. I think this nunvill is getting to me. I gotta go."

I ran off, past Keith, past Coran, past Allura. I needed to be by myself. I hated feeling this vulnerable and weak. Ugh why was I this damn pathetic.

**(Keith)**

Was that Lance? Was he crying, was he okay? I wanted to chase after him, but he would probably thing that's weird, I doubted he even knew I was gay, I doubted he would even care that I was gay. He seemed pretty obsessed with the ladies.

An argument got my attention, was that Pidge and Allura? They were heading towards Shiro. Hunk was also making his way over.

Pidge planning on leaving? Hunk complaining too? No, no, we were apart of something bigger than ourselves, didn't they see that. I started yelling too, what the hell were they thinking? Putting themselves before the lives of everyone else?

I guess, I couldn't understand them, after all, I had nothing tying be back to Earth. The only person who mattered to me now was Shiro and he was right there. I wondered if Shiro wanted to go back home too. Adam, he didn't even have a chance to see Adam. I wondered if the Garrison would tell Adam? Shiro was set on this mission, he knew what was right, to put the lives of trillions over one. Adam never understood that, but I did.

A massive explosion sounded, I dropped to a crouch, what in the hell? Oh god, what did Lance do? Did he blow something up? Shiro lead the way and we all followed. Coran? He was grunting and moving in the clouds of smoke and debris. Seriously what the hell did Lance do?

"What happened?" Shiro asked as he and Hunk helped him up.

The room was a disaster, the once massive blue crystal was in fragments. Okay, I know Lance is dumb, but he isn't this dumb. Then smoke began dissipating, and there he was bruised and beaten up and unconscious. Shiro ran towards him, and picked him up in his arms.

This wasn't looking good. I wanted to run over myself and make sure he was okay, but I still didn't know what was happening, and Lance more or less hated me so maybe not. I leaned in to get a better look, he was going to be in need of serious medical attention. My mind was starting to blur, don't let your stupid crush get in your head.

The Arusian King, perfect, nope, not perfect, his village under attack, perfect, I mean not perfect, but a perfect distraction and something that I could actually help with. Wait no lions, that was going to be a bit harder.

"We'll help you. We just…" I started and Lance groaned again, I felt my stomach flip, no there was nothing I could do for him anyway, there was nothing any of us could do for him without the power of the crystal thing.

I needed to get out of here, seeing him like this wasn't helping, Coran and Hunk already established their own mission, finding a new crystal, okay well I guess it was back to the Arusians. Shiro said he would tend to Lance, see he was going to be fine, probably.

We made it to the village, it was all aflame, no, all the bright and fun, stripped away. I made my way into to attack, but they were...fake? No, no, the castle, it was a distraction.

Allura and I ran back as fast as possible, but we, we were too late.  
No, now there was really nothing I could for anyone. Shiro and Lance were both in danger now. What an idiot I am, I can't even face my own feelings, and now I have put more people in jeopardy.

**(Lance)**

Well I knew the drone was suspicious, but I think it was much worse than I expected. Everything went black.

I heard people shouting my name, my body hurt everywhere, I couldn't move.

I think that was Shiro's voice, what did he say? Send it? No, Space App? No.

That sounded like fighting? Was Shiro screaming? What was going on? Oh it was getting closer.

Someone had grabbed again, a lot less friendly in comparison to last time.

Ow, I think I just hit the ground hard, did someone just drop me on my face?

Ugh, lots of noise again, was that Shiro? He was screaming again. Open your eyes you coward. Come on.

Ahh, that's what Shiro said earlier, Sendak. He was rambling, he had an almost soothing voice. I wonder if he could sing instead of talk.

Pidge, no what was happening to him, he sounded like he was in pain. Wake up you fool.

Everything was blurry, I didn't care who this Sendak guy thought he was, he wasn't hurting my friends, my new family.

I made out a purple blob, hopefully that was him. I lifted my bayard, where this strength came from I had no idea, my whole body was hurting. I lifted it and shot.

I think I hit the right thing, an ugly groan and a the sound of Pidge being dropped. Who knew things went dark again.

I could hear some fighting, was that Keith, I could hear him grunting, if my body didn't hurt so much I would have laughed. Ever listened to a fight scene with your eyes closed it was weird.

"Lance, are you okay?" that was definitely his voice, I tried to open my eyes again, it was still so blurry.

I saw a blobbed hand in front of me, or I hoped it was a hand. I grabbed it. I felt my body move up, nope it didn't feel good, but I liked Keith's presence.

"We did it, we are a good team," I said it, maybe being this far from Earth and family would be okay. I felt a presence on me, it felt like Abuelo. I smiled, I was doing it Abuelo, I was going ot eb a space explorer and savior, just for him. I opened my eyes and I swear I saw Keith smile, maybe not, things went dark again.

Was I being carried? Cradled even? It smelled nice, a little sweaty, but you know some people just smelled good.


	11. A Spark - Part 2

**A Spark - Part 2 **

**(Keith)**

He was bigger than me, not by much, and I wasn't going to let any weight of his stop me from getting him to the infirmary. Hunk had just updated us that he was on his way back with a more than big enough crystal. I carried him in my arms, he had curled his head into me, it was precious, and I could feel myself blush a bit. Shiro took him out of his suit, and underneath I could see hsi fined toned and broad body.

Jeez, if I looked at him anymore I was going to faint. Why does there always have to be something wrong with the cute ones. Straight, idiotic, and annoying. I guess three things had to be wrong to make for how hot, adorable, and precious he was.

We waited patiently for the healing whatever to let Lance out. Well maybe not very patiently. We were all sort of freaking out about it. Pidge and I were both tapping the pod. Allura was telling us to back off. Then everyone was arguing about measurements of time, wasn't time just an illusion anyway?

Well it was about as good of a distraction as any, plus we didn't need anyone else figuring I might have feelings for the dumbass who threw himself at a bomb.

"What are you guys having a clock party?" ugh, Lance, always saying something stu- Lance! I probably would have hugged him if Hunk didn't get to it first. Then Lance had to go and really ruin it, taking about going on dates with Allura and such. Ugh, couldn't he see she had no interest in him? Stupid straight boys they knew nothing.

Hunk and I helped Lance to his room, he changed and we made our way the dining room, him and that stupid hooded jacket. Was I more irritated that usual today? I felt like every time I looked at him I wanted to call him stupid.

Everyone began retelling the adventures of after the bomb, Lance looked right at me and flashed his I am going to say something stupid grin.

"Sounds like the mice did more than you though," did he seriously just say that?

"I punched Sendak!" I yelled, this boy was so dense.

"Yeah apparently after I emerged from a coma and shot his arm off," that wasn't what really happened, and he probably wasn't even in a coma.

"We had a bonding moment I cradled you in my arms!" oh my god. Did I just say that out loud? I felt everyone's eyes fall on me. Shiro was giving me a look, that look your best friend gives you when your crush walks by.

"Nope. Don't remember, didn't happen. So, what happened to Sendak?" Well I guess this was one of those moments were I was supposed to thank his density. Stupid straight boy manages not to realize the disaster gay.

**(Lance)**

As everyone recalled the events I started remembering the snippets from my state of uselessness. I threw myself into a bomb, which didn't really do much because the bomb still destroyed the crystal and fucked everyone over.

I remember it though, the team, I wanted to call them family and Abuelo, I felt him too, and Keith, he smelled good or something like that. What? He smelled good? I mean maybe, I wonder what kind of body wash he uses? His probably used a pretty good shampoo for that hideous mullet.

"We had a bonding moment I cradled you in my arms," he yelled, I could almost see him blush as he said it, or was I just imagining that. It was so easy to get on his nerves, honestly, why didn't I just do this at the Garrison? Oh yeah because Keith didn't have to care about anyone back there. Here he had to be a part of the team.

Oh and apparently Pidge is a girl? And pretty much everyone else knew? What the hell? Wow I was dense. Well, I always wanted a younger sister.

We started take off, because the castle was also a ship. Turns out I was really dense.

After the events of the castle attack I felt much more connected to the team, maybe I was still afraid of getting hurt, but my inner self was getting to my cocky egotistical outer self. I wanted to protect everyone on the ship. Looks like I was going to have to start over compensating. More nonchalant, goofball, lover boy, idiot.

It wasn't hard to accomplish. We already had our first distress call, and another pretty alien made it easy to distract myself. Honestly she wasn't as pretty as Allura and I kept finding myself checking on my teammates more than paying attention to her.

"I would love a tour from one of the knights, but I guess the big one is in charge huh, you have to obey his orders?" Nyma was asking about Hunk? Hunk being the leader, it was almost comical, he was to indecisive and gentle to lead.

"Who Hunk? I don't have to listen to him?" There was the ego, I had been waiting. I grabbed her hand and led her onto the castle. A small tour, and of course, I couldn't resist showing her what she wanted. That was how we ended up in my lion.

"Unbelievable, take me on a ride around the moon?" Hmm, I probably shouldn't. Hunk wanted to get to the Balmera and rescue them. This would just waste time, plus I wasn't really feeling anything. It was like an empty shell of fake emotions.

"We should probably get back to the others," I said getting up to move.

"Yeah, you are right, maybe Keith can give me a ride?" was that jealousy? That was weird, I was pretty sure I didn't have feelings for her and damnit again, people comparing me to Keith.

I pushed some buttons angrily and took off, here we go, which my gut was definitely right, this was a bad idea. I ended up handcuffed to a tree and blue being stolen. Sorry girl.

**(Keith)**

God, Lance was literally the biggest dumbass. Taking off with his lion without telling any of us? Especially after nearly dying. He was so stupid. Probably just doing it to impress that girl, or maybe even do something private. I shook my head just thinking about it. Feelings were intoxicating. I hated them.

What a surprise, Hunk was right and these "rebel" assholes weren't actually rebels and stole our shit and now Lance was tied to a tree.

It was an easy mission. I flew threw an asteroid belt and retrieved blue easy, Lance owed me big time.

"Hey Lance I got your lion back," I said, let's give him a taste of his own medicine.

"Thank you Keith, now can you come unchain me?" he asked, perfect.

"What's that? I, uh, you're cutting out I can't...I can't hear you," ah, yes finally an opportunity to crack myself up.

"Oh come on I thought we bonded! Keith? Buddy? My man?" It was almost cute to hear him pine for my help

Eventually Hunk caved and unchained him after laying into him.

We went on missions and tested ourselves, it was exhausting. Never ending trial after trial, but fortunately the times we did have to ourselves was really great.

I hadn't had a real family ever, but they were growing on me. Pidge braided my hair, Hunk cooked for us, Lance made a fool of himself. Coran was that one crazy uncle everyone had. Allura half the time was a goofy mess of a sister and the other half a responsible mom. Shiro became our space dad, he was skeptical, but I think everyone got used to it after a while.

According to Lance I was the brooding emo preteen, I didn't disagree, I enjoyed my brooding time.

The best times were when Lance or Pidge insisted on a sleep over in the lounge. It was hard to say no to either of them, especially when both of them asked for it. Shiro was in the middle, all of us piling around him. It was comforting. I had been so used to sleeping all by myself all alone that the presence of the other paladins made me feel whole.

Lance and I competed for the big brother role for Pidge, who probably noticed and was now using both of us. We piggyback ran her around the entire ship and played games. Lance was a bit better at it, after all he grew up with siblings. I grew up...alone.

There it was again. Ugh the crippling darkness. Why couldn't I just trust people?

I was in the training room, fighting aggressively, I wasn't really getting anywhere. I was just swinging my sword aimlessly. So annoying. I couldn't even control myself. I couldn't even trust myself.

"Mind if I join you?" his voice practically made my heart flutter, did he really have to use his nice, compassionate, gentle voice?


	12. A Spark - Part 3

**A Spark - Part 3**

**Lance**

I missed Earth. I wondered how Veronica's post at the other Garrison facility was going? And of course Silvio and Nadia were starting first grade, I hoped they were doing well. Abuela was getting older every day, but she was a strong one, I knew she would stay that way. I wonder what my family thought? I couldn't text them. Pidge made it so we could text others on board and within certain distances, but she said there was no way to reach Earth.

Her own face fell when she said it, she told me the whole story about what happened to her family, which for the record won me best big brother award on the crew, because we hugged for like an hour. She knew she could cry around me because I would just hold her.

I made my way around the ship, I was bored. Pidge was busy working on some algorithm or something. Hunk was in the middle of cooking, and it was best to stay out of his way, the only time he ever got angry was over food, and we were thankful for that because an angry Hunk was a terrifying Hunk. Shiro and Allura were sharing what they knew about the Galra and trying to find more secrets from Sendak's memories. Coran was busying himself cleaning and making repairs. I guess that left Keith, I wonder where he was?

I made my way around the castle until I found him in the training room. I watched for a minute, what the hell was he doing? He wasn't focused at all. He was just swinging his bayard around like an idiot.

"Mind if I join you?" I asked, maybe Keith and I could work on our weird dynamic together. I was never really sure how he felt about me. I mean I made fun of him more than the others and usually disagreed with him, I think it was my own unique way of showing him I cared about him, but I doubted he saw it that way.

"Uh, no, go ahead," he said, he looked wary of me, but took a deep breath and easily sliced through half the drones, what the hell? Was he missing on purpose like ten seconds ago? I shot at the drones, it was more instinctual. If I tried too hard I would actually end up missing.

"You know you are actually a pretty good shot," he said, I looked at him surprised, I don't think he realizes how much that mean to me. Hearing someone think I am actually good at something. He didn't compare me to anyone. I was good at it? I could almost feel my cheeks redden. It only took this look for someone to notice me.

"Heh, thanks, I am trying for the nickname, 'sharpshooter,'" I said, as we waited for the next round to start.

"Don't get too cocky loverboy, you are still an idiot," he said making himself laugh, it was nice to see Keith smile, he didn't do it often, and yet it was so bright. Wasn't there a saying, the people who smile the brightest were the ones who knew the most pain. It wouldn't surprise me, Keith never talked about his past. The place we stayed back in the desert, he was living there, and there were two gravestones, his mom and dad? Who was Shiro to him, he often referred to him as a brother, but how did they get like that?

"Don't worry I actually have your back now Keith," I said leaning up against his back, we took out another round of the drones.

"Remember when that robot from the simulator was attacking you, when the ship was haunted by Sendak?" I said thinking back to that, it wasn't that long ago.

We finished the round and slid down to the ground, still back to back, "Yeah we seriously got the short end of that, you almost flew into space and I had to fend off a killer robot while Pidge and Hunk got attacked by food and then played around in zero G."

"I know and Hunk was all like it was the scariest thing that ever happened to me, please, I don't think being sucked into space was a very noble way for a paladin of voltron to die," I said, I felt my head grow heavy again, what if I really did die out here? What if I would never have a chance to go home and get another hug from my mom?

"Hey you okay?" Keith asked, he moved himself off my back and laid back on the floor, his hair curling out in different directions. I was urged to reach forward and play with it. He looked surprised at first, but didn't move away.

"Just thinking about home," I said, ugh what was I doing. This was our home, and the whole goal of talking to Keith was to make this feel like his home too, especially since he didn't have one on Earth.

"I miss sunsets you know," he said. "I don't miss a lot of things about Earth, but I miss the sunsets."

**Keith**

He was playing with my hair, did he realize he was playing with my hair? He had to know he was playing with my hair. I could feel myself melting. I wanted to sit up and kiss his stupid face. Why in the world I wanted that I had no idea. Maybe I should tell him I like him. Maybe I should trust myself and my feelings.

"Just thinking about home," he said, I noticed his mood fall. He didn't talk much about his feelings, or maybe that was because no one asked him. His usual cool guy act made him seem so relatable, I doubted anyone asked him how felt very often.

"I miss sunsets you know. I don't miss a lot of things about Earth, but I miss the sunsets," I said, it was true, you didn't get sunsets floating through space. I used to watch them with my dad and with Shiro.

He was gazing into my eyes, did he realize what he was doing? Straight boy giving off lots of gay vibes. I felt myself tense a bit, should I do it? Should I tell him how I feel?

"Lanc-" I started, I was stopped short by his fingers moving closer and closer to the base of my neck and he started talking.

"I wish I could give you more reasons to love Earth, but sunsets are a pretty damn good one. You know I don't actually hate you, I bother and annoy you because it's better than you being in your head all the time," he said, and he stopped playing with my hair and got up and left. Just like that.

I was left speechless and unable to move. My heart beating hard in my chest, it was almost painful. So he didn't hate me, I was pretty sure of that, but I never did understand the whole insulting and attacking me often thing.

'I wish I could give you more reasons to love Earth,' his heart was so damn big, how even?

"Paladins come to the bridge now," that was Shiro, we must have found a lead, well I guess we are going to have to stick in a pin in that for now.


	13. A Spark - Part 4

**A Spark - Part 4**

**Lance**

Allura was gone, how was this even possible. Why wasn't I paying better attention? Why wasn't I do anything? I literally just stood and around and did nothing. What kind of Paladin was I? I should have been the Paladin of nothing.

Keith was going on about something, hold up did he just say he didn't want to go after the princess. This wasn't Keith? Who was this? I still remembered the fight we got in when we came to space. I said we should take the lion and run, and it was him who told us we had to stay and fight.

"I'm thinking like a paladin," rich, real rich Keith, you went rogue on that base, he didn't even ask for back up. I would have gone with him. I thought we made a pretty good team. When we were on Balmera and we worked together using both of our genius to come up with plans and when we, correction I did really poor charades and Keith still figured out what I was saying. Classic.

"No, you are thinking of yourself because you're too scared to do what's right," I blurted it out unexpectedly, he looked at me, betrayal, hate, anger? Who knew. It was a little out of line, but really him saying we should flee? How we were supposed to do that without our magical Altean princess who controlled the ship? Wasn't Keith the one who ran head first into danger? What happened on that base to make him change his entire approach.

It was fairly unanimous against Keith, I felt bad afterwards for how I snapped, but didn't he understand the importance? We were Paladins we were supposed to fight back and Allura was family.

**(Keith)**

I should have guessed, he still had feelings for her. Maybe if he wasn't so blinded by her perfect beauty of whatever he could see that this was suicide mission, but there was nothing I could do anymore. Everyone voted against me. Alone. Always.

"You fight like a Galra soldier," who was I? What was I doing?

Shiro telling me to take over the black lion if something ever happened to him. No. Nothing could happen to Shiro. I already went through thinking you were dead once, I didn't want to experience it again. Plus being the leader? I wasn't made to lead. I was made to be the loner. What was he even thinking or saying. Lance would make a better leader and he goofed off more than half of the time.

Lance was being distant, I wonder what was bothering him. I wasn't even sure what to say him. Last time we really talked I almost told him I liked him even though he clearly has feelings for Allura.I would appreciate telling him though so he can stop leading me on, stop giving me false hope.

Hey, Lance agreed with me today, that was a nice change from when he snapped at me over rescuing Allura. He had a point then though. We needed Allura and I was being scared, I finally felt like I had what I needed in life. I had Shiro my brother and now my space dad, I had the other paladins, and I thought at the time I had Lance. Guess I was wrong.

Though this whole trusting a random dream or memory that Shiro had seemed pretty sketchy. Sure enough, we were fighting an alien on board our ship.

His sword, that symbol. That symbol...I felt my head spin.

**(Lance)**

Keith was such a dumbass. I could barely look at him. Did he have some kind of death wish? Diving into a fight with Zarkon, he easily could have died, did he not think about our feelings or what that would do to Voltron and me?

Ugh I was so confused, I cared about him, I didn't want him to get hurt, and he wasn't but I was still mad at him.

He had been acting really weird since Ulaz sacrificed himself. I mean I know it was weird having a Galra sacrifice themself for us, but Keith had been so quiet and in his room a lot. I wanted to check in on him, I wanted to comfort him, to make sure he was okay. I wanted to know what was wrong and make it go away.

What were these feelings? I was so confused.

I went to knock on his door, but I just stayed standing there. What even could I say, we had barely talked.

The fight on Olkarion had all of us exhausted, first finding the people, fighting the cubes, then fending off Zarkon. Fortunately we had the ability to worm hole away. Bless. Though Keith and I were bickering a lot again, we couldn't even operate the defense drones without fighting.

Great, he wouldn't even look at me. How was I going to enjoy the pool with angry, tired, and brooding Keith? I was trying to think of something nice to say, but Keith beat me to it, with something far from where I wanted to go.

"Look you stay on one side of pool and I'll stay on the other. And we'll be far, far away from each other. Very far," if that was what he wanted I would respect that.

That was until the elevator broke down.

"Did you have something to do with this?" he yelled at me. Jeez, seriously he was on a real bad one lately. We were all tired, did he have to take it out on me?

"No Keith you aren't exactly the person I would want to get stuck on an elevator with especially while you are like this," I yelled back at him.

"I bet you wish it was Allura," he muttered, as if I couldn't hear him as he stood less that a foot away from me. You know I do with it was Allura, at least Allura would smile and try to be nice about the situation.

"Let's just figure out a way out of here now," Keith said, he examined the walls, they weren't any possible hand hold and it was too wide for just one of us to climb up the shaft.

"We are going to have to link arms and trail the sides together," I said, it was the only plan I could think of. Keith stood their for a moment as if desperately trying to think of a way not to agree with me.

"Yeah whatever, just move right foot then left foot on my count," He said, he linked arms with mine, I could feel his exhaustion through his back. God this was a mess. I just wish we could talk like we used to.

We slowly made our way up, him occasionally yelling at me. Neither of us had the energy to do this.

"There!" he shouted, thank god, I couldn't handle this anymore

**(Keith)**

The exertion of climbing up was making us both sweaty, it was not exactly pleasing to have your sweaty back connecting with another sweaty back. I could feel his exhaustion, he needed a break badly. Ugh I just wish I could hate him that would make things so much easier.

"There!" I spotted a small hatch a few more feet up. I rushed us towards it, the sooner we reached it the sooner we could rest.

I opened the hatch with a swift kick and pulled him in after me. We slid down the vent fast. Lance was screaming for some reason. Who knew? Then of course as soon as we reach the pool, turns out it has to be some weird alien pool that was upside down.

Water hit me in the face and then dropped me down again, what the hell? Not another attack? Lance and I ran back to the bridge, we didn't have the energy to take on another attack, no one did. We also didn't have time to change, so swimsuits it was and no I wasn't just checking Lance out, fortunately I had my priorities straight. We took a picture for later.

I don't know if was climbing up the elevator with him or me going soft because he didn't have a shirt on, but we somehow worked together with the defense drones. We were covering for each other and not running into one another.

I wanted to turn around and flash him a smile, it felt good to be working together again, but I couldn't, first because we were being attacked and second because I had no idea what was going on between us? Plus the whole Blade of Marmora and my own knife were still wigging me out, I didn't understand? Could I finally find some answers? Plus he had been also been weird lately? I can't take all the blame right?

One long battle with Zarkon later with two more wormhole jumps Allura announced she was how they were tracking us. I hadn't even thought about it being one of us, but if it was, it was definitely me It was Galra blood, I almost wanted to spit at myself when I said it. Ulaz was fair and good, but most Galra were horrible vile people. I wasn't even sure if it was true yet, but I knew, deep down. I was Galra.


	14. A Spark - Part 5

Sorry I was at a conference over the weekend!

**A Spark - Part 5**

**(Keith)**

"I can find you anywhere"

I jumped out of bed sweating. That was Zarkon in my dream. Ugh, this was torture. I didn't know who I was and because of that I was putting everyone on the ship in danger, the people I was starting to consider family. Could you imagine if I told them? They would hate me. I think of them as family, but they all already have families...they don't need me, and they definitely don't need a Galra.

I should just run away, maybe Allura or Coran could pilot the red lion or whatever. I shook my head, I wasn't thinking straight. Or maybe I was? I wonder what Shiro would say. Should I talk to him? He was family. I thought back to the day he met me, a traitorous little shit I was, maybe that was who I am?  
I shook my head again, stop. No, don't stop. We need answers.

I packed my bag. If Zarkon was tracking me I would have to run far away, I couldn't tell the crew that I was Galra, they wouldn't love me, people don't love me. Shiro would be fine. He has the others, they can be his family, and if he goes back home he could be with Adam again.

I ran out to the shuttles, no one should be awake at this time, about to climb in I heard something, of course, of course someone had to be awake. I hid behind the shuttle.

"Allura?" I asked standing up, what in the hell was she doing here?

She fell off the shuttle and into my arms, ugh she was ruining my plans.

"Keith?"

So impulsively and without thinking we both decided to climb into this craft to find answers.

**Lance**

Allura and Keith ran off together right before a mission? Okay first of all, did they not realize how stupid that was? We needed Allura to pilot the castle and we needed Keith to form Voltron. Second off, Allura is the mom who keeps us all together and she just ran away and Keith is like one of the stupid siblings I get to fight with. They were both family!

Then there was the matter that a pretty girl and hot guy ran off together, and I was jealous, but it's fine. I knew Allura didn't have feelings for me like that, but it still hurt.

Plus why didn't either of them think, huh if we both go we would be isolating two variables, not one, which won't really help prove anything.

Then if Zarkon did find them? They were planning on escaping in that tiny shuttle of theirs? I mean I always knew Keith was impulsive, but he really didn't think this one through at all. I just hope that idiot stays safe.

Yeah that didn't go as well as I had hoped, I mean we succeeded, we found out Zarkon is tracking us through the black lion, Hunk got some major upgrades. Though Pidge had showed me the video footage of Allura and Keith escaping.

Keith had a pack with him, why would he need a pack to prove a theory?

I tracked Keith down and found him in the paladin lounge. I jumped over the couch and sat near him. Deep breaths, to calm myself laid my back on the seat and put my legs over the backrest and dangled them. It was something Marco and used to do when I was younger, he tried to make up some fake science behind it, but I knew he just liked doing it.

"What do you want Lance?" jeez, this guy always so damn angry.

"Sit like this," I said. Keith looked at me and scoffed.

"Why the hell would I sit like that?"

"Mullet, just do it, what do you have to lose?"

"Well unlike you I still have dignity, but whatever," he moved around and sat like me. I just sat like that for a bit, it reminded me of love and home. "Okay so why are we sitting like this?"

"My brother and I used to do it, I don't know it just makes me feel like I am clearing my head," I said.

"Do you miss him?" Keith asked, huh, he wasn't usually one for sentiments.

"Every day, I think about my mom's hugs, my pop-pop bringing in fresh veggies from our farm, Luis and Lisa playing with their kids, Rachel always trying to one-up me, Marco and I sitting like this, Veronica and I pretending to save the world," I said, my heart hurt for Earth, for my family, but that didn't go to say that I loved the people on this ship.

I looked over at Keith who was completely silent, staring at the ceiling, he had his hands interlaced over his chest, those finger gloves, I laughed and he stared at me, "What?"

"I saw you with your bag, you were going to find out if Zarkon was tracking you and then run away. But I want you to know that I would miss you if you left," I said, it surprised myself, but I knew what I was doing. I turned my head back up the ceiling. "I miss my family on Earth, but I made a family out here. I don't want anything to happen to any of you and you Keith? We couldn't be Voltron without you, we actually need you here. I would miss your stupid mullet that I could probably spot from a galaxy away. I would miss your emo tantrums and angry brooding. I would miss your weird finger gloves and cropped jacket. I would miss my bickering partner."

**Keith**

Did he even realize what he was saying? If he wasn't into girls I would think he is flirting with me, he was making my heart flutter, even though half the things he was saying were actually insults too. For the record I love my mullet and finger gloves, and this jacket was picked out by Shiro and Adam.

Maybe if they knew I was Galra they wouldn't all hate me…

"Lance I want to tell you something..." I started, no I couldn't tell him, not yet, I technically didn't even know.

He turned towards me, he placed his arm under his head and blinked slowly, "let me guess Keefers loves Loverboy Lance?"

My whole body stopped working. Damnit Pidge and that stupid sleepover where she had me come out in front of everybody, but wait, did that mean…?

"Oh stop Keith I am just messing with you, what did you want to tell me?" he said laughing adjusting himself. I grabbed his leg and pushed him the couch, he landed on the ground with a hard thump.

"Nope I'll just go tell Shiro, you are an idiot after all," I got up and walked out the room, regain composure Kogane, can't have cocky loverboy thinking you like him, he won't let you hear the end of it.

**Lance**

Hmm, did he blush when I said that? It was hard to tell, I mean I know I am pretty damn irresistible, but I for sure thought Keith hated me.

Maybe he didn't hate me? Maybe he didn't...hate me? What did that mean? Why did I care? Ow, my head hurt again. Oh yeah Keith just threw me into the floor.

"Why are you on the floor?" Hunk said walking in eating something, I had no idea what it was but it smelled good.

"I tried to talk to Keith and he threw me into the ground," I said as Hunk took a seat next to me and handed me some of what he made. "When we go back to living normal lives will you promise to teach me how to cook," I asked, he was such a natural born chef.

"Love to, but why were you trying to talk to Keith, don't you guys supposedly hate each other?" Hunk said, I loved him, but he was usually in his world. In fact, everyone had a tendency to, we had one another's backs, but no one choose to connect with each outside of that. We would have fun together, but it was just like at the Garrison, people who were friends, and I wanted these people to be my family, they weren't ready for that. With time Lance. With time. With time they would see you like an important part of the team, and more importantly a part of the family.


	15. Sleepover - Part 1

**Sleepover - Part 1**

**Lance**

Everyone was exhausted, but now that Shiro had strengthened the bond with his lion we weren't as worried about Zarkon following us. Coran was working day and night to get the teladav discs fixed. After that we were going to go to the Blade of Marmora and hopefully defeat Zarkon.

"Pidge, what do you think about having another sleepover?" I asked her, I was lying on the bed in her room. I was supposed to be monitoring her while she cleaned it up, but I didn't really care, there were seven people on this entire castle, why did it matter if she had a messy room?

"Yes, I say this time we have it the grand entrance, Allura and Coran have to be there too," she said playing rummaging through her stuff, she wasn't even trying to clean it, just going through it, reminiscing.

"You know I never told my mom about changing my identity, she probably thinks I just ran away, and I left her all by herself, well I guess she has bae-bae, but she lost my dad, my brother, and now me," she said, she was staring at that picture of her and Matt.

I stood up and sat next to her, "Yes, but you are going to find your family and bring them home to her, and you can all be together again."

"Sleepover time now, no more crying for the night," Pidge said standing up and wiping her tears away. "I will tell Hunk to make some snacks, let's go gather some blankets."

She ran out the door forcing me to chase after her.

"Why are we having a sleepover?" Keith grumbled, ugh, why was he trying to ruin the mood? Allura helped us hang up some light lanterns. Coran scoured the whole castle to find every single blanket he could find. Hunk made food for four hours straight. Pidge and I made a list of sleepover activities.

"Oh shush Keith, think of it as some relaxing team building exercise," Shiro said pulling him into a side hug. Keith rolled his eyes.

"Fine whatever," Keith said and Pidge gave me a smirk. Looks like it was time for the first activity.

"Glad you are onboard, because we are starting with facemasks and hair do's" I yelled, and rubbed facemasks on every single persons face while Pidge did everyone's hair the way she saw fit.

It was great, Keith brooded the whole time I rubbed it onto his skin, occasionally threatening me while I put it on him. Pidge braided his hair and then put it in a bun, it was quite the look.

Mine was in two very tiny pigtails. Hunk and Shiro both had unicorn pony tails. Allura's hair was braided perfectly and Coran's was in five different pony tails.

"Okay now a movie, a scary movie," Coran shouted, he browsed through the shipsp archives and found Altean entertainment videos, now we had no idea what was happening, but Allura and Coran would scream occasionally. Fortunately Altean movies were a lot shorter than human movies.

"I wasn't sure what you do at sleepovers, but I told Coran to bust out the nunvill, you all seemed to enjoy before the whole Sendak invasion thing," Allura said.

None of us let Pidge drink, who pouted about it for a while, that was until she realized she could a bunch of drunks mess around. It also made Keith a lot more inclined to stay, I don't think he was enjoying it yet.

A few drinks of nunvil in and some really great stories shared by the whole group Pidge insisted on truth or dare.

Last time we played we found out that Shay gave Hunk a balmeran communication crystal, it wasn't like a phone, just a vibration thing. Keith revealed that he had never dated anyone, but lost his virginity at the Garrison with an older classmate, and Shiro looked like he was about to pass out. Shiro revealed that he didn't hate his white tuft of hair, even though we all made fun of him for being old because of it. Allura said she had never been with someone, she was too young to be formally courted before she slept. Coran said he dedicated his life to his best friends Alfor and Hornerva and never found time for love, but took to helping raise Allura making her family. Pidge told everyone that she never really liked anyone like that. I told everyone that I had never dated anyone or done anything with anyone, everyone was rather surprised.

This time was going to be much spicier, or at least that was what I was judging from Pidge's face.

"Allura, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"What is the best secret the mice have told you?"

"Keith sings in the shower, and apparently really well," I forgot that the mice were horrible at keep secrets and fantastic eavesdroppers. I got up to get another drink and when I sat down Keith's blush still hadn't gone away, probably because everyone was asking him to sing.

"Well if you won't sing for us, then truth or dare Keith."

"Truth, you aren't going to make me sing that easily."

"Who is your favorite person on the crew?" I leaned in eager to hear, I did want to be everyone's favorite, but Keith was such an interesting character I honestly had no idea.

"Well Shiro obviously, but I have known him the longest," oh well, that made me feel really dumb, I knew that. Everyone else groaned, well except Shiro, we all knew they were like best friends back at the Garrison.

"Shiro, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to sit like Lance does for the rest of the game."

Sure enough he threw his legs around like crazy until he was somewhat comfortable, though the best part was his undeniable flushed cheeks from the drinks.

"Lance truth or dare."

"Truth."

"What is your sexual orientation?"


	16. Sleepover - Part 2

I will post double for the late post 3

**Sleepover - Part 2**

**Keith**

"What is this sexual orientation?" Allura asked, I turned towards her, but I kept Lance in my side view, Pidge knew exactly what she was doing.

I ran into her the other day blushing like a psycho after Lance tried to comfort me. She asked why I looked like a tomato and unable to hold back I told her everything. She smiled devilishly and disappeared, four days later here we were playing drunken truth or dare.

"On Earth there was a long history of partnerships consisting of a female and male, with time and great efforts the humans became more and more accepting of nontraditional partnerships and gender identities. For example Shiro and Keith are gay, or interested in other men, while my dad is straight, he married my mom, a woman," Pidge began explaining.

"Ahh, I see, it is more traditional on Altea to marry those of the opposite gender, but that is for the sake of child-bearing, many on Altea are asexual or curious," Coran said.

"Yeah you know I think if I had to label myself I would I am pan, Shay really showed me what love and compassion was, and it opened my eyes a lot," Hunk said blushing lightly. I was living for all this positivity.

Lance was rolling around on the ground when we realized it was him who we asked. He stopped when he noticed everyone was staring at him again, I wondered what he was going to say, I was highly invested. I would finally figure out if he had feelings for me.

"Uh-uh, um, you know I have never really had very serious feelings for anyone in the past, but if I had to guess I would say...straight I guess, I tend find beautiful ladies captivating," he said before blinking quickly at Allura who rolled her eyes.

Well, that does answer that, looks like I was right all along, straight loverboy Lance. I suppressed my sadness with another drink of nunvill.

Hunk had to juggle his food, Coran re-enacted a yalmor call, Lance did a headstand for twenty minutes, Pidge and Shiro put on dresses, I had to sing, unfortunately, but it wasn't that bad, plus I doubted anyone would remember it when we woke up.

"I miss juniberry flowers, they have the most lovely smell," Allura said.

"I miss rain, I was thinking about it the other day, walking down the beach in the rain, the smell of it, the feel of it gently pattering down on you," Lance said.

"I miss my Uncle's cooking," Hunk said stuffing his face with food.

"I miss bae-bae, hopefully she's taking good care of mom," Pidge said.

"I miss teaching," Coran said. The sentiments were high. I wasn't sure what I missed. Obviously sunsets, but Earth never gave me that much to miss.

"I miss Adam," Shiro said and I felt my whole body shudder. Adam and Shiro.

We used to be a little family, and that fell apart, maybe I wasn't made for families? No I couldn't blame myself. Dad ran into that fire to be a hero, I am not sure what happened to mom. Shiro didn't go on his mission because he didn't love us, he did it for himself, he needed to do it. Adam and I we understood why we left one another behind, we caused each other pain thinking about Shiro being dead.

I reached for my neck, I remember burying the dog tags at Shiro's grave when I thought he died.

"Keith I am so sorry," Shiro said bursting into tears, maybe he had a little too much nunvill. Everyone stopped for a second, unsure what to do. Hunk and Lance definitely knew Adam, Adam taught many of our classes and Shiro and Adam were the it couple of the Garrison, everyone wanted to be as cute as they were.

"Shiro, it's okay I always understood, I think Adam did too, deep down," I couldn't say for sure, Adam fluctuated a lot after Shiro left. Swooning, trying to get over him, angry yelling, sobbing in the shower, from sweet remembrance to bitter hatred. Though I always knew Adam loved Shiro, no matter which of those phases he went through he went through them because he loved Shiro.

We all group hugged around Shiro for a bit but Shiro demanded we continue our game.

"Truth or dare Pidge."

"Dare."

"Put as many of those marshmallow things in your mouth as you can."

Pidge rolled her eyes but did it fitting at least five in there, I was impressed for how tiny she was.

"Lance truth or dare."

"Truth."

"Rank the hotness of the crew members," damn Pidge was out here calling everyone out.

"Rank you all? On hotness? Pidge you are automatically at the bottom, because you are not only my sister, but you are adorably cute, and fierce and sassy. You own the world," Pidge smiled and gave him a hug, Lance was getting to the swooning and sentimental drunk, but more interestingly an honest drunk.

"Allura I think you are beautiful, but I wouldn't say hot, you are elegant, strong, and determined, you will make a great leader one day and whoever you are with better treat you like the princess of the whole damn universe," Allura's cheek marks glowed a soft pink as he said it.

"Coran I will have to give it to you, you have a type of old man hotness, but I think what really sells you is that you aren't afraid to be yourself, outgoing and funny, you enjoy laughing and can laugh at yourself," Coran blushed and planted a kiss on Lance's head.

"Hunk, my bro," he said fist bumping Hunk first, who quickly sat up and waited patiently for Loverboy Lance to effortlessly describe him. "Look at you, a full package, strong, proud, a little shy, but so brave. Compassionate and kind. I mean whoever you spend the rest of your life with has an expert cook and loving companion, and that is pretty damn hot."

"Shiro, I consider you my space dad, but I am not going to lie back at the Garrison when you and Adam would spar shirtless it was pretty hot. You got that chiseled body and great hair cut. You are brave and a leader, and honestly I make fun of you for that white puff of hair, but you kill it," Shiro laughed and tousled Lance's hair.

He landed his eyes on me. Oh stars, that look in his eyes, I swear I could kiss him, what was I saying, stop it.

"Keith, you are brooding, it gives you these biker vibes, I don't think your hand gloves and mullet are helping you out there, but it is hot. I never thought I would say a mullet is hot, but somehow you manage to pull it off. Plus your eyes, they are like this blue grey steel color, it's crazy intense to look into them. Plus when you actually open yourself up you are this down to earth guy, and I really enjoy that about you," holy shit, I was bright red, maybe everyone would think it's just the drinks, but I was ready to pass out.

"But the hottest person here is obviously me, I mean look at me," Lance said before hiccuping, Lance took to getting up and dancing around the room, Shiro placed a hand behind my back.

"I think we have a little bi-mess over here," Shiro said, his voice a little slurred. I shook my head at him. I think Lance was just being Lance.


	17. Sleepover - Part 3

**Sleepover Part 3**

**Lance**

Okay maybe my tolerance of nunvill wasn't as high as I thought, but it wasn't that bad. It's not like we were going anywhere. I guess we should have thought more carefully about the fact that we were drifting through space and could run into trouble at any moment, but being in this moment was so much more worth it.

The nuvill was nice, just like drinking when back home, letting me forget about all the problems of the world. When Keith and Allura disappeared the other day I was reminded of how unessential I was to the team. Without Allura we would lose Altean magic and the pilot of the castle. Without Keith we lost our fearless fantastic instinctual pilot and one of the best fighters. Without Shiro we didn't have our awesome space dad and fearless leader. Without Pidge we lost all the intellect and hacking ability, as well as her perfect personality. Without Hunk we lost our compassionate glue of the group, and he was an amazing chef and mechanic. Even Coran was so important, helping keep morale high and rushing to fix any and every situation. He was like a crazy uncle who always showed up when you least expected, but when you really needed. Me? Who was I? The fuck-up goofball who couldn't be good at anything? I was easily replaceable when you really thought about it.

I shot back the last of my nunvill. Drain away the pain am I right? We were still playing truth or dare, a few funny things here and there. We taught Allura and Coran what fuck, marry, kill was, but both of them felt a little uncomfortable with the idea of killing or crudely 'fucking' someone. Allura said she would happily marry Shiro who just blinked uncomfortably. Coran said he would marry Hunk so they could cook together, which was pretty damn cute.

I was starting to really feel the nunvill set in, pain and suffering shoved far into the back of my head. Inhibitions and restraints gone. I probably could have done anything if someone dared me.

"Keith I dare you to kiss someone," I watched Keith's face drain of all color and then suddenly turn bright pink, it was kinda of nice seeing him with his guard down and emotions present, but he still had some inhibitions, unlike myself. I wondered who he would kiss. Probably not Shiro because he is like a brother/dad to him. No one would dare touch Pidge. I think Coran might be a little old for Keith. Hunk was practically dating Shay. Which left Allura and myself.

He closed his eyes and began overthinking it, why? I knew he would be too shy to kiss Allura, he should just kiss me. Easy.

I winked at Pidge, who looked like she was enjoying this too much.

I started to crawl my way across the circle, damn, he was so in his head he couldn't hear me huh? Hunk was trying to stop himself from freaking out while Shiro rolled to his side his face completely flushed and nearly gasped when he saw me. Allura and Coran were aggressively snacking on food, like two people eating popcorn. I stopped inches from Keith's face, waiting for the dumbass to open his eyes. I would make it easy on him.

"I guess-" he leaned back up and opened his eyes, they fell directly on me, I mean I was blocking his entire line of sight. I leaned and kissed him, he over thought everything, couldn't he just have some fun. It was only a kiss. Keith needed to learn to let go and live a little.

Keith jolted at first, but then finally leaned back into it. I pulled away, he was still blushing, and I just rolled over and squeezed myself between Keith and Shiro. They were both so warm, and I was cold.

"I think we should probably call it a night," Shiro grumbled pulling a blanket over him.

"But things were just starting to get so spicy," Allura said, still freaking out.

"I have to admit this is not how I expected the night to go," Hunk said.

"Perhaps bed would be best, there's much to discuss tomorrow, or I guess today, I am not sure, adjusting our ship time to Earth's time has been rather strange.

Pidge jumped over onto me and Hunk rolled closer to the huddle. I adjusted myself to lay with my feet up the wall. I was weird, I didn't care. I placed a pillow over my face and was out in seconds.

Someone was snoring, not really loud, but I woke because they were snoring on me, like it was tickling me. I moved the pillow from my head, hmm, no headache or slow sucky feeling. Nunvill may have tasted like feet, which Hunk really tried to help improve the flavor, but at least it didn't hurt as much Earth alcohol did the next day.

Was that Keith? My eyes adjusted to the darkness. Keith's head was tucked into my torso, he was snoring, very lightly, it was almost cute. I felt bad about getting up, but I couldn't handle the tickles anymore and I really needed to use the restroom.

I tried to push myself up, but Pidge had wedged herself between Keith, Shiro, and I, and was gripping onto my arm. Ugh, so damn cute. I carefully slid my arm out, and she rolled to hug Shiro's arm, okay one down. I tried to wriggle away as gently as possible to stop Keith's head from dropping to the castle floor as I stood. Allura was laying a few feet from us, sleeping exactly as I would imagine a princess would. Coran was starfished on his stomach a few feet from her. Hunk took his place on on Shiro's other arm, the mechanical one, but I didn't seem to bother him. Keith's body was Shiro's pillow I had to admit we were all pretty damn cute.

I made my way down the corridor to the nearest restroom. It had been a wild night. That movie was horrible, but it was fun trying to explain random Earth quirks to Allura and Coran. Then there were the moments we got really emotional; favorite memories of home, what we wanted our futures to look like, what we missed the most. Things got put out there; everyone described their sexuality, I felt weird talking about mine because I didn't really ever think about it. Earth's culture had changed a lot over the years, but I was so used to looking at family which consisted mostly of heterosexual pairs. I had some inklings that Marco was exploring, I think Veronica might be bi-sexual, but she also put her learning first so I didn't really know about her love life.

I splashed some water on my face and looked in the mirror, I also kissed Keith. I should probably talk to him about that, I may be the virgin, but he was a lot more reserved. I wonder if I violated his personal space, I was pretty drunk. I hope I didn't offend him, especially after I had been pushing so hard to make him my friend.

"There you are," a groggy voice said from the entrance, it was Keith. His hair was all messed up and crazy from sleep. "When I woke up you were missing, glad I found you I was worried."

He proceeded to go into one of the stalls and use the restroom, hmm, maybe Keith was starting to feel more comfortable around the rest of us. I remembered back to when we were at the Garrison, when I first tried to be his friend. I wonder what our younger selves would say to us getting along now, well sort of getting along.

"Hey Keith, I just wanted to say I am sorry if I crossed your personal space bubble last night, I hope it doesn't mess up our friendship, I should have asked," I started babbling, until Keith who just finished washing his hands placed his index finger over my lips.

"Shhh Lance, it is too early to listen to you ramble, but sure friends or something, we are good," he said moving his other arm to my shoulder, where he practically fell asleep. Jeez, a disaster indeed. I adjusted to hold him up better and I rested him down here I had been sleeping earlier. I brushed through his hair a bit, you know it would do him wonders if actually put his hair through a care routine. I laughed and thought about Keith and I being friends. We were different, and both a little stubborn, but I liked a challenge, especially if it meant spending time with someone as badass as Keith.


	18. What is Friendship - Part 1

**What is a Friendship - Part 1**

**Keith**

Okay, relax, make sure your thing doesn't get too excited. It happened last time and I practically ran out the door. We were just friends. I had never had a real friend before, not really, but was it normal for friends to be this close?

I was still recovering from the events from the events of the sleepover. Lance told me I needed to calm down, it was just a playful kiss for a dare. I guess I could see that. Maybe I really did need to calm down. He also caught half-asleep Keith who agreed to be his friend, which Lance didn't let go of. We spent almost every day doing friend stuff together at least one thing just the two of us and other times with Hunk and Pidge too.

The other day we had a food fight in the kitchen resulting in Hunk passing out, it was fun though. Fun, huh, I never really thought I would have that, but the crew really made me enjoy my time out there. I laughed and smiled and would think about our memories together. I guess this is what I had been missing out on my whole life while brooding.

When we all went to the mall I took the "mission" too seriously and missed out on some of the fun, where I actually became jealous of. I guess you could say I didn't want to miss out on fun since I missed out on it while growing up. Lance surprised me by getting me an MP3 player, an MP3 player, I had no idea what it was, none of us did, I guess it came from older times on Earth, it played music though, I liked it. He told me not to tell Pidge that he found extra gac in the fountain since Pidge had been working day and night to hook up their new game to the Altean tech.

I was enjoying this whole friend thing, even Shiro was opening up more, he and Pidge had an adorable father-daughter relationship in which Pidge could also get away with almost anything. Hunk and Shiro would practice some flight techniques here and there. Shiro and Lance would sometimes practice in the training room together. Shiro was still hurting, he had lost so much, I was happy to see him finding home again.

"Keith, Keith look," Lance running into my room. I was half naked laying on my bed, and practically threw myself under the covers surprised by his fast entrance. "What haha, trying to hide your body from me, we went to the pool together and have trained before I have seen your chest and tiny legs before."

Ugh, I rolled my head into the pillow trying to hide my embarrassment, I groaned at him "I wasn't sure who you were I was surprised."

"Well stop pouting and look at this," Lance said jumping on top of me, he stretched out over my back. This kid, needed to learn boundaries. I sat up fast and pushed him off me. He landed on the ground, completely unfazed, he was holding an Altean tablet reading something. I leaned forward placing my chin on his shoulder.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Pidge and Coran adapted a translator program to the Altean archives. It's just catalogs and catalogs of history, research, art, and books. I have taken to investing myself in some of these books, awfully fascinating to learn about Altean culture through these stories," I looked at him as he was completely invested in the words. It was adorable. No, I shook my head, we were just friends, and our friendship was something else.

I had never had a best friend, but Lance was definitely mine. He was sweet, funny, and also made fun of me here and there and I would beat him up over it, but being around him made me happy.

"A book nerd huh? I never took loverboy Lance for a book nerd," I said, I reached up and fixed his hair, there were strands going in all different directions.

"Well not a lot of people know this, but back home, I mean home home, at Varadero beach my older sister Rachel used to sit on the beach and reach books all the time. I would nag her to read them to me when I was really young, and since then I fell in love with these other realities, with these characters who seemed amazing. You know that's why I act the way I do I think. I think I created my own character, the Lance I want to be, confident, talented, and loved," he said, he had put the tablet down and started to stare at the ceiling.  
I didn't even know what to say, it actually made a lot of sense though. It always seemed Lance was trying so hard to make everyone else laugh and trying so hard to be all these things he wasn't. He didn't have to be the best pilot because he was still a great pilot and a great fighter. He didn't have to a lady's man because he was already perfectly loveable. He didn't have to try so hard, but he always did anyway.

"You know I love the real Lance, this Lance," I said and instinctively I leaned in and kissed him temple. I nearly fell out of my bed when I realized what I had done, but Lance didn't seem to mind at all.

He turned and looked at me, his eyes big and watery, "Thanks Keith."

Oh stars, I loved him. Focus, I loved him as my best friend. I gave him a hug and he handed me the second tablet he was holding.

"I snagged one for you, I am not sure if you a reader, but there's lots of other cool information. Nothing on Voltron though or the war between the Alteans and Galra, it was weird, but I thought you might like it, plus it helps pass the time. Space is a lot more boring that I imagined," Lance said, he began to stand to leave, but I pulled him back down.

"Just stay here," I said, he smiled back and sat on the bed with me and we explored the archives. I found entire pages on the history of Galra, I would have to come back to that later. Lance spent hours trying to organize all the literature into different genres, but most of it just seemed like science fiction to us. We just laughed and enjoyed one another's presence. This was nice. This was happy.

**Lance**

I opened myself up to Keith, and to my surprise he welcomed it. I would consider Hunk and Pidge two of my best friends, but there was a whole other level of friendship Keith and I had. Not to mention that with Hunk thinking about Shay and cooking and Pidge thinking about her family they haven't had a lot of time for me lately. Keith on the other hand, he and I didn't have other things to do in space.

Being with Keith like this, it made me wonder if this was what real best friends were like. I remember Veronica and Rachel talking about their friendships with their best friends. Can't spend more than three hours a part without calling or messaging the other, sleep overs and cuddling, doing everything together. They described feeling more comfortable to be themselves around their best friend. I was certainly starting to feel that way around Keith, I was just personally glad he was letting people into his life.

"All Paladins please report to command," that was Coran's voice, I startled, looks like I fell asleep reading one of the books, and I was still in Keith's room, in fact, I was in his bed. When I sat up I realized my head had been nesting on his knee, he also had fallen asleep, his tablet was on his face. I laughed and picked up the tablet.

"Keith come on we are needed," I said to him, the tablet came alive in my hands, looks like he was doing some research on the Galra, of course, Keith could never just read for pure enjoyment he always had to be thinking about the mission.

Keith had tousled around before jumping realizing I was sitting on him looking at his stupid messy hair.

"What's going on? And why are you sitting on me?" his scratchy voice said as he kicked me off of him. I landed on the ground laughing. Nice to know that no matter what agressive Keith was always there.


	19. What is Friendship - Part 2

**What is Friendship - Part 2**

**Keith**

This was it, I would finally get some answers. Why did my blade have this ensignia on it and what did it mean? Would the Blade of Marmora even know? Whas Ulaz the only person to have answers and I watched him sacrifice himself for the team?

"We made it to the Blade of Marmora base, but…" Pidge said. I practically dove into her, what was this but. I needed to know right now.

Lance grabbed onto my shoulder, he didn't say anything, but he could sense I was on edge, more so than usual.

"It's wedged between a blue star and two black holes, it's insane," she said zooming into the most beautiful space fixture I had ever seen. "It looks like the coordinates point to right here."

Everyone continued debating the coolness and the dangers, and all I could think about was the answers, I needed the answers. I needed to know.

"What are you talking about? We have to go in! That is the whole reason we came out here! There is no other option!" I yelled out, Lance grabbed my shoulder again, he was eyeing me this time, I could feel Shiro's eyes glaring into me too, but my head was moving too fast to focus on them.

"Identify yourself," the comm channel picked up.

"We are the Paladins of Voltron, sent here by Ulaz," Shiro said back, calm and confident as ever.

"Two may enter. Come unarmed," the channel responded. Unarmed? I was bringing my knife in no matter what, and we had to take one of the lions through, it was there best means of navigation.

"We must move quickly, the safe route is only open for another varga and then it will be closed for two quintants," Coran said, I was missing most of the discussion, my opportunity was here. I could finally know who I was.

"They're gonna close it for two years?" Hunk asked panicked.

"Two days," Pidge grunted. Two days was still a long time...

"So any thoughts on who's gonna join you on this little mission? I'm thinking things might get a little hot, so you're gonna want someone who can stay cool," Lance said, there he was, the overly confident funny Lance, he had been too soft back in my room and up until now. Wait, there was a chance I wasn't going with Shiro? No I _needed_ the answers. I moved to grab Lance when Shiro started talking.

"You're right. Keith, you're coming with me," I breathed out, I really didn't want to have to tackle Lance.

"Wha- Keith's a hothead, he's probably going to shoot first and ask questions later! They're not gonna be able to answer his questions because they'll be dead," Lance shouted, I couldn't tell if he wanted to go for the glory or if he was concerned about the mission or possibly concerned about me. Plus I had noticed Lance trying to get closer to Shiro, he probably had the least nurtured relationship with him.

Shiro said something about the red lion being the best suited to go in, I guess he had a point, but I had a good feeling it had something to do with his and Keith's relationship. If Shiro was going to put his life in someone's hands he probably trusted me the most.

Lance gave him a hug before he went into the red lion, "please don't be a hot head."

I nodded and climbed in. My specialty was not thinking things through, and my head was a big ol' jumble of shit right now, but he would at least try.

Shiro felt like having a heart to heart right there, the stars would only know why. Here I was flying razors edge not to kill us both and Shiro brought up the possibility of him dying again. What the hell, I didn't want to think about Shiro dying or me having to lead. I wasn't made to be a leader, i was barely made to be in a group.

The conversation was brought to a fast end when Red started veering to the edge, all the alarms going off. I quickly adjusted and brought us out of it. Hot head, hmm? I can handle myself fine. Now landing on an empty looking asteroid and entering a creepy internal base and then getting pinned to the ground was not ideal.

"He has one of our blades! Who did you steal this from?" the one who had me pinned yelled taking the blade from me.

"I didn't I've had it all my life," I snarled back, struggling under the weight of the much larger Galra man.

"Lies!" my memories flashed, my dad showing me the knife, telling me it was my mother's gift to me before she left. He never talked about her with hate in his heart, ever. It always had me wondering who she was and why she left.

"Tell me what it means!" I yelled. I knew what it meant, but I needed someone to tell it to me. If not I was never going to believe it.

"We came here to form an alliance, but obviously we're not welcome. Come on Keith, we're leaving," Shiro said helping me up, but I wasn't leaving without my knife.

"Not without some answers. Somehow, one of your knifes ended up with me on Earth, tell me how," I pulled out from under Shiro. I was so blinded. So in need.

"You see knowledge? There is only one way to attain knowledge here," Kolivan responded.

"How? I'll do it!"

"The trials of Marmora. Should you survive, you may keep the blade and its secrets will be revealed," the words were barely registering, the answers, I needed them. The only thing I heard next was "Knowledge or death."

**Lance**

Great take Keith down to a group of people who had barely showed us any hospitality other than last minute sacrifice. What is these people weren't as friendly or cooperative as Ulaz, who was barley friendly as it was.

I had been looking for ways to prove myself to Shiro, but it looks like he was still stuck on Keith. Which was stupid in itself, did Shiro noto recognize how irritable Keith had been lately, especially when it came to the Galra and the Blade?

I sat their counting away the hours, two days before they could return, well thirty vargas now, which were a bit longer than normal hours.

"How long has it been?" Allura asked impatiently, I had no idea why we all felt the need to stay in the bridge, but we did.

"Roughly ten vargas," Coran responded, we were all tired, but we had a sort nervous energy keeping us awake.

"We cannot just wait here," Allura said, no that was exactly what we were going to do, these Blade of Marmora proved they were not ones to try and cross. Ulaz proved kicking our asses was easy enough.

"The path is closed for thirty more vargas or something?" I posed it more as a question, knowing me I probably fucked up the calculation, getting used to the difference between galactic time and earth time was still weird.

"That's actually correct," Coran said smiling at me.

"Really?" Hunk said, in disbelief, surprise I am a little smarter than I look and act.

"Yeah, I wasn't born yester-quintant," I said, suddenly Allura started claiming she needed to know what was going on down there. Yeah we all wanted to know. Pidge started spouting some nerd stuff than I tuned out, then Hunk responded and looked at me.

"Are you looking at me?" I never said I was a genius, just slightly smarter than I looked.

Coran and Hunk began looking at some diagnostics when Pidge grabbed my arm and dragged me off the bridge.

"So concerned about Keith that you actually kept count of the time?" Pidge said pushing up her glasses judging me.

"Huh? Well our watches are turned to galactic time, so I started comparing the differences so I could know how long we had been away from home. I just happened to use my knowledge here," I said, but yeah I was worried about Keith, and Shiro, they were both parts of our team.

"Oh, oh well I guess that makes more sense, I have a stopwatch going in my room, if you ever want to check it, it has how long we have been away from home. I use it for my journal," she trailed off, I pulled her into a hug. I also had a stopwatch in my room, I wrote whenever I could, letters to my family. Things I wish I could tell them.

"I got to get back to Coran and Hunk, maybe you should rest for a bit, if anything happens you'll be the first to know," she said, I nodded, she had a point, if anything happened when the path opened again we would need to be on our A game.

I made my way to my room and pulled up my tablet. I read through some of my letters.

_Mi abuelita, _

_Te extano tanto, pienso en tus abrazos y tus turrones todos los dias. Espero que tu y todos esten felices y bien. Estoy bien, es un poco solitario aqui, pero todos tratan de ser amables conmigo. Nunca pense que estaria salvando el mundo, perso espero que eso te enorgullezca a ti y a abuelo. _

_Besos y amor, _

_Lancey_

_[Dear grandma, _

_I miss you so much, I think about your hugs and torrenes [Cuban snack] every day. I hope you and everyone are happy and well. I am good, a little lonely here, but everyone is trying to be nice to me. I never thought I would be saving the world, but I hope that I make you and granspa proud. _

_Kisses and love, _

_Lance]_

_Marco, _

_Quiero hablar contigo tan mal, siempre sabes lo que estoy pensando y siempre sabes que decir. Solias decirme que podia hacer cualqier cosa, pero realmente no creo que pueda. Todo lo que quiero es ir a casa y jugar en los campos contigo. Corre por la playa con Rahcel. Mirar las estrallas con Veronica. Grupo de abrazos con Luis y su familia. Escucha a mom cantar y ver bailar popop. _

_Te echo de menos, mucho, _

_Lancey_

_[Marco, _

_I want to talk to you so bad, you always know what I am thinking and always know what to say. You used to tell me I could do anything, but I really don't think I can. All I want is to go home, and play in the fields with you. Race along the beach with Rachel. Stare at the stars with Veronica. Group hugs with Luis and his family. Listen to Mom sing and watch Pop-pop dance. _

_I miss you lots, _

_Lance]_

No I wasn't crying. Why. Would. I. Be Crying. I closed out now was not the time to start getting emotional nor write another entry. The release was nice, but the pain was always so much.

**Keith**

I was able to get out of the fighting ring, I had bruises and cuts everywhere. Though the physical pain didn't bother him, it was the mental screaming, he needed to know, and they weren't letting him.

When he looked up Shiro was standing there, I breathed out, finally. Wait, no, he still didn't find the truth yet.

"Just give up the knife and let's get out of here," Shiro said, no, no I couldn't leave yet.

"I can't give it to them Shiro," my stupid ass, Shiro had been to my shack in the desert a hundred times, in fact, literally he was wearing my dad's old vest right now, why did I never bother him to show him this dagger? He wouldn't have taken it away from me, especially if I had told him it was the only thing his mother ever left to his dad and him.

"What is it with you and that thing?" he hissed at me, that wasn't like Shiro.

"It's the only connection I have to my past. It's my chance to learn who I really am," why was he making this so difficult?

"You know exactly who you are. A paladin of voltron, we're all the family you need," the words stung, but only because I knew they were true. The whole team saw me as a brother, and perhaps finding out I am Galra will ruin that, but I needed to know.

"Shiro, you're like a brother to me...but I have to do this," he was a brother to me, he was my only family I had, the only one who still believed in me when I gave up, but I was so close, so close to the truth.

"Just give up the knife Keith, you're only thinking of yourself as usual!" he yelled, I felt my heart pound as he said it. Maybe I was only thinking of myself, all my irrational yelling and forcing the team here, everyone else was here to stop Zarkon, why was I here?

"I've made my choice," the words came out of my mouth, I was going to be selfish.

"Then you've chosen to be alone," Shiro turned to walk away, I closed my eyes, my brother, my family.

A bright light engulfed me, this is my house? I looked around and then my eyes fell on my father. Dad?

"Keith," he said, his rugged accent, I never thought I would hear his voice again. My heart ached.

"Dad?" I practically squeaked.

"You're home son," he said, I am home? No, no this wasn't home, a loud explosion from outside, I walked towards it, what was happening

"What's going on?" before I could touch it he took a step towards me.

"Don't worry about that. We'll be fine as long as we stay in here. Don't you wanna catch up?" since when did staying inside while explosions were happening ever lead to being fine?

"O-of course I do," I said, he hadn't seen his dad, in years, the last he saw him, the smell of smoke and the tears from ash plagued him.

"Son, so many years have passed. I have so much to tell you," he said. I had so much to tell him too, another crash.

"What is that?"

"Everything's fine," but his dad's words couldn't stop him this time, he looked out and there was a Galran warship, the red lion sat out there, calling for him.

"Dad, I'm sorry, I gotta go. There's people that need me out there," my chest burned as I said it, but this was my new life, and I knew it wasn't really my dad, my dad was dead.

"Don't you wanna know about where you came from? Your mother gave it to me," the mention of my mom stopped me in my tracks. His dad didn't talk about her often.

"Mom?" I asked, I tried to tune out the explosions, technically none of this was real.

"She'll be here soon," he said, maybe I should wait.

Voices were screaming in the back, I felt my stomach flip at the sounds.

"You gotta tell me dad, I have to know. Where did the knife come from? What does it mean?"

"Your mother is almost here, she'll tell you everything," I struggled, the screams, I didn't want to hear them anymore, but I wanted to know.

**Lance**

Pidge had told me to come back up, they were nearing the time.

"The red lion is moving!" Allura shouted, they hadn't heard a transmission from Shiro or Keith yet, so that could only mean one thing…

"We gotta get down there," I yelled.

"It won't be ready for five more minutes," Hunk said. No we had to get down there.

I muttered under my breath, "Keith."


	20. What is Friendship - Part 3

**What is Friendship - Part 3**

**Keith**

"I can't wait around anymore, I have to go," I said, walking towards the door.

"If you go out that door, you'll never find out who you are," his dad said.

"Keith," it was a faint whisper in my ear, but that voice, it was Lance's. I knew enough about who I was.

"Goodbye dad," I said, walking out the door.

"Keith, are you okay?" that was Shiro, I lifted myself up and found Shiro standing over me, I took his hand.

"Stop what you're doing?" Kollivan yelled, the base was shaking around them, what was happening.

"What are you talking about what is going on?"

"Call off your beast!" Kollivan yelled.

"Move out of the way, we are leaving," Shiro said.

"You're not leaving with that blade. It does not belong to you. You failed to awaken it," Kollivan said.

He watched as Shiro prepared his knife hand as Antok squared up to him, no, no this was too much.

"Wait! Just take the knife. It doesn't matter where I come from. I know who I am. We all need to work together to defeat Zarkon, and if that means I knife, fine. Take it," I said it, and for the first time I didn't feel my chest hurt, because I knew my dad, the hero he was, and my dad would run into a burning building to save someone. I knew Shiro, who would defend me without even knowing if I was telling the truth about the blade. I knew my crew, I knew Lance. I knew where I belonged, I knew I was here to defeat Zarkon. I knew to give up being selfish.

The blade shown in my hand and shifted into a sword.

"You've awoken the blade!" Antok said.

"The only way that is possible is if Galra blood runs through your veins," Kollivan said, and there was my answer. The answers I had known but waited to here for so long.

Kollivan led us back to my lion, he was just as confused as me. Shiro hadn't even looked at me yet, I had no idea what that meant.

"Princess, we're coming back, and we're bringing someone you should meet," Shiro said.

"Yes, they did it!" Pidge yelled, I could hear everyone else breath deeply. They wouldn't be when I told them the truth.

They were waiting for us in the hangar, I brought it to a landing, Kollivan made his way down the steps, Shiro grabbed my shoulder.

"It doesn't change anything, you are still my brother," he pulled me into a tight hug, and I held back the tears. Thank the stars, but as we walked down I watched Allura's eyes glare daggers at Kollivan, Shiro might not care, but others were. Allura's entire people were destroyed by Galra people. Pidge's family was kidnapped and taken from her by the Galra, Hunk and Lance had big happy families home and here they were fighting a war they didn't ask to be a part of.

"Keith!" Lance yelled running up to him to examine his bruises and cuts. "What the hell did you do to him?"

Well that was unexpected, Lance practically jumped Kollivan, Hunk and Shiro intervened before anything worse happened.

"Lance, why don't you take Keith to the medical bay," Shiro said, guiding Allura and Kollivan towards the bridge. I wrapped my arm around Lance's shoulders, watch him say no now.

**Lance**

I carried Keith to the med bay, pretty confused and annoyed. I mean I was just expecting Red to have freaked out because it sensed danger, not because Keith literally had the shit kicked out of him. He didn't dare say anything either, as if not saying anything was going to make it better.

I set him down and started aggressively pulling out medical supplies, fortunately after the third time cleaning the entire medical bay with Coran he taught me what all the Altean supplies and drugs were.

"Drink this," I said handing him an advanced cough syrup that supposedly helped heal bruising. He drank it silently, still not bothering to say anything. I grabbed some medicinal salve and a suture type kit and began tending to his cuts.

"Hey so…" he trailed off looking for words, I didn't' say anything. I didn't have anything to say until I could actually figure out what happened. I rubbed the salve on a little harder than I should of, but Keith still didn't flinch.

"Um...yeah don't worry they didn't attack me, I sort of asked for it...and that's why I look all beat up, but it's okay," he said, what the hell did any of that mean, he asked to be beat up? And somehow that was okay?

"I don't have the patience to figure out what the fuck that even means," I snapped at him, threading through one of his deeper cuts. His perfect skin was not enjoying the way he treated it. Honestly if he could avoid cuts and then use moisturizer.

"I have been looking for answers about my mom," Keith said, trailing off again. I wondered if he realized that he literally never talks about his past so I have no idea what that means.

"I never met her, and my dad said she left when I was young, this knife is the only thing I have to remember her by," he said pulling his dagger from behind his back belt holster. I eyed it, I had seen it before, but it was missing the cloth usually wrapped around the base of it, and where the cloth usually was, the symbol on Ulaz's own blade.

"So when I arrived I demanded for answers about my knife, which didn't go so well because they thought I had stolen it or something. After some pleading they told me the only way to get answers was through this thing called the trials of marmora," he put the knife back in its holster.

"I got my ass handed to me by much more skilled and bigger Galrans before finally escaping, but then apparently I met a fake Shiro and I selfishy told him to leave because I needed answers," I almost dropped the medical supplies I started gathering to put away. I deliberately looked away from Keith, he was going to leave them just like that?

"I got plunged into some weird memory realm where my dad was there. He kept telling me my mom would explain everything but there was a war on the front, I knew I had to go, I had to protect the people. Then you'll never guess what happened?" Keith stopped for a minute as if expecting me to know the answer.

"I heard you call my name," yep I dropped the salve on the ground and it of course rolled all the way over to Keith. "Yeah, weird huh? Anyway I left right then and there, because not only did I have people to protect, I had a family, I had Shiro, I had the crew, and I had you."

I turned around slowly, Keith was looking at the salve that rolled next to his foot, he grabbed it and carefully stood to walk over to me. He placed it in my hand and just stared at me for a second.

"And then…?" I said with the breath I had been holding back.

"Well then it gets really weird because I came out of the memory and Shiro was about to fight one of the blades, but I said something like 'whatever I don't want the blade I just want to end Zarkon and I know who I am so I don't need it' and then the blade grew in my hand to a sword like Ulaz's and then Kollivan told me that meant I had Galran blood in me," he spat the words out so fast I could barely keep track.

"You are Galran?" I said, the words falling from my mouth, I wasn't sure what that meant, but Keith's face fell as I said it. What better way to get Keith to smile than say something to annoy him or fluster him? "So like can you grow a tail because that would be way hot."

He punched me for that, yeah I deserved it, but we both fell on the ground laughing.

"So you don't care?" he stopped laughing and looked me in the eyes, they were full of worry and sadness, as if I would care? Keith had no control over the fact that he was Galra and he didn't even know until just now, it's not like he was responsible for this war, he was literally eighteen years old.

"Why would I care? You are brooding emo Keith, which actually being Galra explains so much now, but being Galra doesn't automatically you a monster, you are Keith, you aren't defined by your species."

**Moving to posting one chapter a week, started writing some other things in the mean time and want to give myself some room!**


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